Take a Walk (in my shoes)

I walk from the parking lot to the school building. I'm gasping for air, desperate to fill my lungs with oxygen. I can never take deep enough breaths.

My fingers go numb with cold, and I have chronic dull pain that clings to my body.

I sit in first period.

English.

Nothing is amiss. Except everytime I raise mt hand and answer a question (every single time a question is asked), I see the rolling eyes. I hear the scoffs.

I know I'm annoying. I sometimes just don't know when to shut up. Silence makes me feel trapped. So I have to talk or I'll go insane.

Second period.

The teacher - Freaks me out.

Creepy rumors flew around about him. I keep my head down in that class. I only speak when called on. I scribble down story notes and doodles in a sketchbook.

I zone out until I have to rush to copy the notes before the page is turned.

I occasionally help my friend in front with work, but I talk to no one else.

I zip out of class as soon as I can.

Third period.

Everything is too loud. Silence is horrific but I hate disorganized chaotic noise.

The teacher can't control it and I hate it.

My hands itch to fidget.

My stomach aches, because I skipped lunch that morning, and now there's nothing to do but suck it up.

I do my best to pay attention.

Fourth period.

I come back from lunch. I have a grin on my face.

I finally finished a full plate of food without my friends reminding me to eat.

I grin through the entire class.

Then the classmates start screaming at each other, laughing and yelling over the teacher.

I dig my nail into my wrist to ground my mind.

Fifth period.

I zoned out. Again.

I hate this class.

The teacher doesn't understand how my mind works, and it is frustrating.

Nobody in this class likes me. They all think I'm an annoying know it all. They're probably write.

I scratch at my wrist under the table as I try to focus on the lesson.

Sixth period.

Finally. A class I adore.

The teacher is kind.

The work is tedious, but so well worth it.

I'm working towards a career.

I tell my teacher I ate today, and she was so genuinely proud of me.

I feel oddly tired.

Drowsy.

I scratch at my wrist and walk to 7th.

Seventh Period

I sit in the auditorium.

I stew bitterly, thinking about how I deserved that part more. I respect my director, but seriously? The girl who was cast doesn't even care about theatre.

It hurts.

So, I instead sit and do homework.

Nobody requests my help.

It feels as though my place in the class is easily replaced.

Home

I stay on my phone all day.

I skip snack.

I barely eat dinner.

I blast music and scratch at my wrists.

I write fanfiction.

I scratch at my skin.

I message my girlfriend.

I want to take a shower, but I'm already lying in bed. I can take one tomorrow. (I don't end up taking one the next day)

I play music and curl up in bed.

I fall asleep.