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my mom is strict but not strict. she lets me go out with my friends and lets me stay up late on weekends. i find it hard because she takes things extreme not so bad but things that are not so extreme highly says no to. She lets me get a nose peircing, she let me dye my hair, and wear lashes. But not makeup, acrylics, or even a crop top? she says that she doesnt let me wear them because "they dont look right on my body" and "your going to be embarrased if you wear it". but how tho its my body. correct me if im wrong, but is she basically saying my body , but her choice? it doesnt make sense. She wont let me have a boyfriend which most parents dont allow but all my friends have boyfriends and girlfriends. she always thinks that im talking to boys but i cant even get a guy to stop leaving me on opened lol. but she also sets high expectations . like she wants me to be a 90's grade student. i get that that's your expectation for me but you gotta realize that i cant make that happen. she takes my phone away when i dont do something right or i dont get good grades. You guys think its okay to take away your kids social life if their grades are bad? like omg. But as long as my grades are high and my room is clean, ill be able to do anything i want, right mother? I dont know what to do anymore im just tired.
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I am a teenager too. My parents are somewhat the same way and there are days when I feel confused, tired and frustrated too. From what I see, no doubt she loves you and that is the only thing you need to understand, it is her first time being your mother and it is your first time being a daughter too. Your mother cares about you and I can see it through your story. First, you very much need to understand where she is coming from. she wants you to be happy but at the same time is afraid you might do something that would end up hurting you. You should assure her that you can take some decisions and when she will understand I can assure you, it'll be you and her against the world.
Replyi understand you. im a little different. my mother takes my phone all the time. she has parenting apps on all my devices. it allows her to read my messages, and look through my personal things. i cant even takes about her because she reads it. im currently typing from my school computer; the onlty thing she doesn't have restrictions on. she takes all my devices at night. im not allowed to go to sleepovers either. she yells at me for everything and always accuses me of lying. my room is almost always clean btw. i told her i want to get a nose piercing; she called it slutty. i told her i wanted social media to talk to my friends; she told me i didnt deserve it. i posted a pic i thought i looked pretty in (for reference it had a little bit of cleavage because i had a tank top on); she called me a whore. she found out about my self harm; that day i was attention seeking. about once a week im either a slut, a whore, stupid, undeserving, needy, ect. im 15 btw.
Replyaw man im sorry. im 15 too:( and parents wonder why we dont wanna talk to them when were grown up.
ReplyI too am a teenager. My parents are were overprotective (more-so my mother). At times I felt like it' was too much, they didn't allow me to hangout with friends or date anyone she didn't seem fit (nearly all everyone lol) but she was just trying to protect me. She has told me at my age she was raped, hurt, and got addicted to drugs but her parents' never cared. She turned her life around and now she's this overly strict person. But I know deep-down she's doing it all to protect me. What I did was have an adult conversation with her. Take time to plan out your points, how you view the situation, what could be done and such. It is very highly she won't agree to what you say, but you can both make an agreement that benefits both of you. You each sacrifice a little. For example, I told my mom she could look over my phone whenever she wants, I would focus on getting better grades, I would hangout with "appropriate" friends (no drugs, no staying out late, etc), I would share my location with her when I'm out, and so on. Make accommodations to the point where you both are satisfied. It may or it may not work because every parent is different. But I am also grateful she even lets me do those things because I have friends whose parents don't even let them have a phone at 17!
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