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I can’t get over the fact that my boyfriend dated and was in love before me. I don’t know why but it’s so frustrating that I keep thinking about him being with others and that feeling that he might leave me for another girl. I get jealous of remembering that he was in love with someone before me and that person could still hold a special place in his heart. It makes me so frustrated I wanna scream and cry. I may be too jealous and maybe I’m toxic but I honestly don’t know what to do. It grates my nerves every time I think of him being with someone else. What should I do? Sometimes I feel like I should break up with him for that reason, because I can’t accept the fact he was with other girls. It feels like he’s cheating on me and it’s crazy. I feel crazy. I don’t deserve to be in relationships probably and the worst part is I am one of those hopeless romantic people. I wonder if he would chose her over me any second.. I feel toxic and I want our relationship to work but I also can’t accept the fact he was with another women. Maybe I’m insecure? But I honestly doubt that part, I would never put down a women he dated but I would just get upset with him. I really do love him, he is the most important thing in my life and I don’t want to lose him but this overthinking made me into a jealous doubting girlfriend. Please tell me what to do, cuz this overthinking nonstop is breaking my heart and my relationship.
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Friend, he broke up with those people for a reason, and if he leaves you for them, then he's just not the one for you. Talk to him about it, and if he says something along the lines of no i wanna be with u not them i would leave it alone until you get actual evidence that he has feelings for an ex. Communication is key! You've got this!
ReplySee a therapist and get yourself sorted out. It isn't normal to be jealous of anyone's exes.
ReplyYou need to talk to him. I’ve been in your boyfriend’s situation and was literally just about to write about how I’ll be in love with someone and they’ll leave because they think I’d ever leave them. I’m considering this serendipitous. He’s with you, remember that when you speak to him. Address your insecurities, and remember it is you and him against them
Replyheyy! I'm an overthinker too, this friend of mine, me and him are really really good friends.. him and I never dated... bc that wouldn't work with personal reasons but we are in love, he knew this girl before me, and she had said something to him (not gonna say exactly what happened bc it's not my thing to say) but moving on she was gone, and everyday I get so jealous that he loved someone before he loved me, and everyday I'm wishing the girl doesn't come back, and i've asked questions about her and he won't like to answer, and he always says to me "why r u always looking at the past, I don't give a f^ck about her anymore" and I guess it was time for ME to learn that, that's the past, she's gone and she won't come back, and if she does, he knows to never go back to her, and he wants me to trust him, and finally I am, but that doesn't mean she doesn't comes in my head sometimes, are you gonna waste your time thinking about the past or are you gonna live your life in the future, and trust him? Think about it, stop overthinking, trust him, you shouldn't doubt him, don't lose control, focus, breathe, and trust. I wish you luck, my friend.
ReplyJealousy is normal. It’s like a check engine light in a car. It’s not okay to take jealousy out on him, but you gotta address the issue
ReplyIf someone mentions others, I mentally check out. Relationship is over.
ReplyI went through the same thing because he just wouldn’t listen to my insecurities and validate them. He just kept acting the same way towards other people and make me feel toxic all the time. Fast forward to an healthy relationship I’m in and he now makes sure that I know that I’m “above all exes”.
Of course I had issues and needed help with those emotions but honestly… he should make you feel like you don’t have to worry about anything and even if you do without reason, he’s supposed to be there for you and help your relationship move forward from that.
Relationships are between two people, problems need to be solved both ways
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