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i am 20yo and I had really difficult and (mentally and physically) abusive childhood, growing up i never had any proper gurdian or friends to share my situation with and i self diagnosed myself from 4 years of depression , i used to self harm and i was critically sucidial when i was in depression 1 years back, but now I am totally alright and my family stopped hitting me physically for a year and half now.. I'm very unbothered with their mental abuse bec i have grown and become wiser from before and i can see through them i have done a lot of healing and ik i have a long way to go
But yesterday my mom slapped me for a very silly reason we had a little argument and i was acting like it's fine i was acting chill and suddenly when she left my room i got a panic attack, i Haven't felt this way for a long time, i felt overwhelmed and i started crying and all the memories from before suddenly started coming back and i felt dizzy and i sat on the floor and i cried so bad idk wht happened ( i want to understand wht happened and heal it so if anyone know wht happened) i think it wasn't a panic attack cause it feels like you are going to die, mine wasn't that extreme i think, so wht was it?
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The shock of the slap brought memories of your past back to you and also caused a mild panic attack. I used to have panic attacks until I had tablets for them and one day a woman unexpectantly spoke sharply to me and caused a panic attack, so the shock and suddenness of the slap brought this on for you. You are too old to be slapped so have a good talk to your mother about this and tell her what she caused and to never slap you again because after all, you are old enough to stop having a parent/child relationship and old enough to have an adult to adult relationship with your mother.
ReplyThe best thing to do is just keep working on yourself. Meditation helped me a lot with anxiety (if you do try it, it's way better when you do it several days in a row not just the once)
I think also just learning to realise what you can control and what you cannot control and then trying to only focus on what you can. Try not to dwell on things in the past. Including the slap. But I agree with the other commenter. I would tell your mother to not slap you again.
It seems like you already have been working on yourself so just keep it up, I believe we're never done working on ourselves. So instead of seeing it as you have a long way left to go, try to remember how far you've already come
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