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Have you ever felt that you are exactly where you are supposed to be? That this is what is meant for you?
I never felt like this before until I started my current job/study.
I just know that this is what is going to fulfill me. That this is what I have to do.
I’ve never been sure of anything until now.
After the first part of my study I had to write some kind of exams. They weren’t that hard yet I still failed.
Not because I’m bad but because I was sick during the time of preparations and during the exams. I should have called in sick but for some reason I didn’t.
I don’t know why.
I have one more try but if I fail again I’ll have to leave the workplace forever and can never reapply ever again.
I have never been this scared for my existence.
I don’t ever wanna wake up hating my job, hating to have to get up to go to work and I don’t want to leave the people I’ve met.
I know I’m good. I know I’m prepared for the upcoming exam. Even my supervisors said I was one of the best students they’ve ever had and that they couldn’t understand how I could’ve possibly failed. They were visibly shocked.
I know I’m not dumb.
I’m scared.
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