ex

why did you make me go through 7-8 months of suffering and tolerating your bullshit when you took one, ONE fucking week after i tried to break up with you. i communicated with you so many fucking times the past months. all i ever got back were "oh ya sry i'll change" "i promise i'll change" "i'll try" well you sure didn't even try. maybe for like what? one or two days? then what? i did my best, i communicated so much, i tried to tell you all my feelings but you always shut me down, i never felt heard at all. i never felt understood. you changed so much since the first time we got together. all you could've said was "i dont know how to comfort you but i'll be here to listen to you" and you damn well know that thats enough for me but you didn't even bother anymore. i fucking hate you i hate you for ruining my mental health, i fucking hate you for wasting my time and effort, i fucking hate everything about you, the way you fucking laugh, the way you smile, and especially your eyes. i hate everything about you. i wish i never met you at all i fucking hate you so much. you had 7-8 months to change and only took that one week into consideration where we had our "break" but i was mentally prepared to leave you. i always was. since last year december. i fucking hate you for ruining me and doing things i did not want to do. i was just blinded and i can't believe i was that naive and stupid. i hate myself for not saying no but i hate you the most i fucking hate you i wish i could forget all the memories i made with you. i wish you were wiped off clean from my memories because i don't want to remember you anymore. fuck the good times we had together. i'd rather have been alone than have gone through all that bullshit with you. but guess what? the damage is already done and i've learnt my lesson. not to be so vulnerable and dependent on people anymore. not to put effort to people who doesn't want to do the same. thanks i guess. i hope i fucking forget you i hate you so much lol. fuck you for everything i hope you treat your next girl better and i hope she doesn't go through the same shit i've went through