God I miss you!

I can't believe it's been 8 months since you left. At the beginning I thought I understood the situation pretty well. I remember telling myself this was the natural thing to happen. People come to this world, stay here for a while, and then just eventually leave. I was pretty sure I was ok with this belief. Now I know I'm just not. Bad thing is that I can't change it. I can't turn back time. It's impossible. The problem is you being such an important part of my life, and me not being able to hug you one more time. People keep saying that everything will be fine; I keep saying it to myself all the time. I don't think it's working. Today, I wasfeeling sad, you know. Turns out I just remembered it's the 27th. You left on a 27th. A part of me died with you that day, and it hurts to know it won't ever come back. The other day I was thinking that the only pure love I have ever had was the one you gave me. You were there no matter what, no matter how, no matter who, no matter why, no matter when, no matter where, you were there, you were always there. Now I wonder, am I going to find a love like yours again? How could that be? You were the only grandma I had left. God knows you're missed. I just hope that somehow you're somewhere watching over me and sending me that love of yours so this pain turns into something that doesn't hurt this much. I love you, I miss you, I wish you were here next to me, I wish I could hug you, I wish I could kiss you, I wish I could tell you about my bad and good days, I wish you were home, I wish I could listen to your voice again, I wish I could give you a phone call, I wish you told me that everything will be fine, I wish you were there when I get home, I wish I could see you smile, and I wish you answered "YES" once more. (- Me: Do you love me? - You: Yes. - Me: So much or just a little? - You: So much!) I'd love to hear that answer again. Love you, Mita!