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Stuck somewhere want my sleepless nights and exhausted days to end
10 months ago · 4 · Stress, +8
256
As usual am feeling uneasy sad frustrated exhausted whenever something happens to someone or anywhere not in our house my sister start acting as she is only one affected by it and fights with us start abusing me and my other siblings she swears shouts throw tantrums at us for no reason she thinks she is the only one understanding those people who r sick or fighting (our relatives) like If someone is sick or having fight why creating such a abnormal environment here in our home too .. ? Am so tired by such things.....and its like a daily routine for us having infinite arguments at our home. All of my younger siblings r so rude and unmannered.they thinks they own us me and my2 elder sister but thiz one sister is just too much more am 19 she is 1.5y younger than me..she always plays victim once she was with someone when she was just 14 it was like normal fling secretly but when that boy told her it's not more than that just after 1 week she start behaving weird and me and my sister got to know and helped her but then she was eventually got diagnosed with depression & for 2 3 years we supported her in everyway we can we gave her our best. I even got beaten by her but I endure everything because I wanted her to be healthy and happy again ... she is no longer depress but since then she thinks she own us because we listened to her without saying no those years she now plays victim all the time always shout at us swears at us even she doesn't listen to our mom but she is okay with everyone else litterally everyone cousins relatives her friends and online friends ... if we try to tell her it's wrong to always acting like thiz she says we r the one who made her like that I mean why? She start saying I only care for to showoff and then say so bad words to me she is always loudly shouting at me but if I say 1 word she will say how I doesn't treat her right and doesn't understand her . Am from a desi Muslim middle class family because of her my studies was disturbed but I tried my best and completed 10th class I always wanted to study further but no one supported me especially cuz of her that she need attention don't do anything just stay home I tried 2 times to study again but because of our disturbed household I had to quit both times I m super sad frustrated exhausted always stuck in my home doing house chores from morning to night it's 8 30am here and am still awake I can't sleep how my classmates who were with me in secondary school and high school r graduating from 12th class thiz month and am just here stuck behind with regrets and unfulfilled dreams.. my mom got angry issues too so she says wht I do all day which makes me feel tired when i do housechore all day we r family of 8 so we got big house & how am supposed to tell her or anyone how Am feeling? I m tried of being in thiz situation...
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i think ur motivation rn shud just be that i wanna graduate with good scores and get a good uni then u can be out of all these toxic things... i hope u don't hv any prblms like ur parents won't support u with money and all...all the best!! rooting for you!
ReplyThe problem is my parents don't want me to study so I can't graduate and get in uni ....as I said am from desi family they said u will be a house wife so why bother studying......:'l thats why I just stay home and suffer
ReplyYou can talk to them alone... like understand them, don't accuse...Don't say to them why do you always stop me whenever i do smthng, rather ask- Can you tell me why can't I study, what if i study in a good uni and cud help you all financially. Understand them too and then make them believe in you...then i hope u hv frnds, let them also get involved in this a little, make them come to ur home just for a little study or anyother thing and let her give their perspective like i am going to this uni after i graduate and so on and make her ask that which uni r u going to in front of ur parents and make them feel a little guilty..they may think abt it! let your parents know, “While money is important, it’s also important that I do what I like. I want to discover my path and I will work hard to earn good income at the same time. So please don’t worry, Papa/Mumma. I know what I’m doing and I will make you proud.” Make them believe as i said! Unless your parents are cutting you off, like throwing you out of the house or cutting off your allowance (if you’re still financially dependent), you can still pursue your path without their blessing. If they constantly discourage you, assert yourself. If you work from home, work in co-working spaces (where you can get good support). Or in very severe objection cases, move out if it is an option, to get some space until your plans take off...Less talk, more action, show them even ur little succes mom/dad i ranked 5 th position and eventually u cud rank 1st.
At the end of the day, remember that your parents love you. Don't hate them.
ReplyNo I never hate them....its just am tired of living the same live each day is same for me ..wakeup housechores using mobile in BTW sleep in the early morning thats it....... I can't convince my parents abt studying cuz here in my family girls Don't do job so yeah and unfortunately i dont have friends either......and I always was good at studies i got 1st position in my school each grade thats why I wanted to study further cuz i like it but in our family it doesn't matter much no pressure of studies except when u fail maybe......sorry am just sharing with u all thiz stuff cuz I was so fed up by just telling all thiz to myself again n again ......
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