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How do I start this...
I'm in love with this guy, he's a lot older. I'm 15 and he's 20. We met off this game. He's rough with his life (his dad), but chooses not to talk about it and I don't push it. He's an introvert and would rather talk to me than anyone else. He's never dated and doesn't want to. I don't know what it was but in the beginning of our friendship I knew I liked him but I obviously couldn't say it. I was 12 when we became friends and he was 17 at the time. We knew not to become close but we were friends. When I turned 15 I knew I loved him. We got closer, never did anything crazy. In February, I had dated a guy who was the same age as me. I knew it wasn't going to work and all I could think about was the other guy. He was crazy and I couldn't be with him. After the break up, a week later I had told the guy that I loved him. He didn't say anything. Later that night, he said he felt the same way. I had asked him why he didn't say it before and he'd told me it was wrong. He's 20 and he doesn't wanna be arrested.
We're really in love but we know we can't be together. (He lives in another country)
My parents don't know but I'm waiting till 18 to tell them and to finally date him.
We're not dating because we know the risks. We understand.
In the beginning of our friendship I always texted "ily" when saying goodbye. I remember him one day telling me to stop. I felt hurt. So I'd try to back away from him but it was hard. He'd wonder why I was taking it too seriously but he'd explain that he's much older and that it's weird for us to do this. After a while at the age of 14, he said it was fine.
So my question is would you allow this?
Honestly I've dated 8 guys, and no one can compare to him.
Knowing that we're waiting till I'm 18 to date and he's willing to only be with me.
Dating 8 guys was a bad choice, but it was also a lesson. It taught me many things. I know whether a guy is bad or not.
With this guy, I can't even describe. I don't know if this is genes or something because my parents are 12 years apart. I feel weird telling them this, but I just wanna wait till I'm 18.
If he knows I'm upset he knows I'd rather someone leave it then to ask me about it, and at times he'll talk to me. He doesn't like when I get upset and neither do I. It's a sucky feeling. All he has to really do is just talk to me. Knowing he's around is a feeling I can't describe. He knows me. I know him. We love each other.
Would you allow this?
Would you rather call the guy and talk about it with him?
How do I tell my parents when I turn 18?
I know it's wrong yet I'm still doing it, I can't just leave and love someone else.
I know I love him. I know I'm absolutely in love with him. I can't leave him even if I tried. I tried for 5 months. It was a weird feeling. Everything in my head all I could think about was him. Everyday I missed him. I'd wake up to write about him (I write a lot). Every time I thought about him, writing was my only thing to do. When things were good, for some reason I was brought back to him. It would give me headaches. After 2 months you'd think I'd be fine. No, it was terrible. But in that time I had become very independent. Stopped putting my feelings out, and let people tell me it was okay. I always wanted validation. I always wanted someone to tell me I was good enough or worth it.
I've learned with my time off. I gained. I lost. But I had done something.
When I came back he was honestly really upset. I wasn't telling him I'd leave. But I saw the messages. Everyday there was a message (discord). He texted me everyday. When I came to see a message for that day, he said "wth where are you?" and I replied with "right here".
I read those chats he'd send everyday. It was so sad, because he was alone. He chose not to talk to anyone but me. He said he's waiting and I believed him because we'd have a gc with a group of friends and I know how he reacts with other people. When he has one person he's not letting that go.
So. What's your opinion on this?
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You know although I am definitely not a mother and same age as u but one thing which I'll say is u both r kinda already in a relationship it's just that unlabeled uk u should just be there for him in every possible way and everything will fall in place soon
I am hooting for ur love 🖤
ReplyAlso I can be there for u if u need someone to talk to
Replyofc, as you say it's unlabeled it kinda is. But we won't agree to that fact yet, not till I'm 18.
I just wanna be 18 already. I'm always there for him, and never letting go.
Tysmm <33
ReplyProud of you 🖤
ReplyI am a mother and I think this is okay because you are waiting until you are 18 and you should be more mature by then and know then what you want. Don't lie to your parents. Don't worry now how to tell your parents when you are 18. You will know what to say then.
ReplyYes, I may not be so mature now, but when I turn 18 I'll understand more things.
Trust me I don't wanna lie to my parents. This is the biggest secret I have, my only. I feel guilty sometimes. I just wanna tell them, but idk how they'd react.
I hope I'll know.
Thank you.
ReplyIf you are going to wait untill 18 then stop dating other guys. (If he gets to know about it you might go into issues).
ReplyOfc ofc, the last guy I had broken up was in February and he knew about it.
I tell him about every guy that I have dated.
Plus knowing that we both love each other and just waiting for me to turn 18, I haven't dated a guy since. That love is for him.
ReplyI am actually 17 but I just wanted to say in my humble opinion, just keep going. Life is all about making mistakes , regretting your actions and learning lessons from them. Don't stop. Yes , think before you take a step forward towards your feelings , but if it feels alright to you , then just go on with it. Don't forget that at the end of the day , everything would be fine in its own way. You don't know whether your decisions would bring you happiness or sadness. But they would definitely teach you something. Just keep going with the flow of life. You are lucky to love and to be loved :)
Replyi’m close to your age and i kinda fallen for this guy too it’s been a few years he’s older than me most likely 3/4 years apart. I haven’t talked with him in a while tho. But we met on a game a few years back and i had a bit of a crush on him we would get a long well but it’s kinda hazy he was really nice and kind not like other guys. I’m sure he’s a introvert kinda guy. I miss him a lot. I’m rooting for you and this guy tho like that kinda relationship seems nice he may be 5 years older but you can wait and so can he i wish you the best i would totally get with him after meeting and seeing if he was good irl.
Replyhe seems sketchy like a pedophile and the only reason why he wouldn’t let you text ily is because you weren’t at the age of consent i say don’t date him it seems sketchy
Reply