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I’m 31 years old. My period got delayed 4 days and I found out I’m pregnant after taking the test. My last day of period was 21 June. I was with my boyfriend on 29 June. We were cautious but somehow still got pregnant. In medical term considered 1 month pregnancy, but I think actually pregnant like 1 week. We are not in situation to keep the baby. I’m sad it has to be this way. I feel like it’s gonna be a bad karma for doing this but I feel like I can’t provide good life because mentally and physically and emotionally I’m not ready to be a mom. The timing is not right because I’m not financially stable, a lot going on I’m my career and and society here won’t accept and we won’t be supported by families. But deep down I feel like I’m a terrible person for choosing to do this. I feel sad and guilty and I’m being so hard on myself for not being cautious enough. I believe in spiritual world and I feel like I’m gonna hurt this soul. They say it’s early and still clump of cell. I have been crying and I can’t talk about this to my family. I feel guilty and sad. I’m so so so sorry. I will be a better person….
***Update : I went to see Dr today to do ultrasound. Dr said the pregnancy is way too early because he couldn’t find any sacs formed in the uterus or probably fertilised egg haven’t implant but start producing the HCG hormone. That could be the reason why urine test was positive. He could only see like tiny blood clot in the ultrasound. He also mentioned that maybe it’s just chemical pregnancy.
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ReplyAlso, you know what’s the worst thing about going through this process…I don’t have enough emotional support from my partner. He don’t understand me emotionally because I feel sad as this is my first time and I had to take pills. I was never this kind of person. I don’t have any support from female figure. I in a situation where can’t talk about this to my family or my Mom. And telling my partner only making me feel alone in this process because he is busy and he don’t feel the same way as I feel. Every time I share with him how I feel he say I’m overthinking and he is only giving me the bare minimum. It’s like he just cares his needs. His body tiredness and sleep. Emotionally unavailable.Only making me even worse. I feel like no one here that can understand me.
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