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I have suffered with mental health for so long,
I have good days and bad days,
In my last relationship, i was betrayed which caused a lot of problems and how i see things.
He cheated on me so many times and constantly made me feel so low.
However, i managed to overcome that over some time but it took a lot for me to grow.
I went out every single weekend and got black-out drunk, i was losing myself.
I met someone that made my heart flutter, he was what i needed,
He loved me in ways no one else has.
I have really bad anxiety, i struggle to do things for myself, thinking people are judging.
He really struggles with understanding why i am this way,
He just passes it off as if I'm being silly,
He's like a child, when something happens that is out of his control he doesn't know how to handle it and throws a fit.
i try my best in helping.
I love him, i do.
Going back to my previous relationship, i was hurt and traumatised.
I find it hard to trust, but i trust him.
Things have been rocky between us, after the honeymoon period you learn more and more about each other.
We're working our differences out.
I had a gut feeling something was going on, he wasn't his usual self.
When he slept i checked his phone, i know its very invasive, but i needed to, to give myself some ease within the situation.
I had noticed he has been adding other females on social media,
Now we have set some boundaries in our relationship, this was not okay.
I decided to keep it to myself, and tried to let it go.
As days have gone on, he was getting more and more distant with me.
So i asked him about it,
He got defensive and tried to worm his way out of it.
This really hurt me.
I just feel so low.
I've been through enough heartbreak, he knows this.
So why must he do these things?
The question no one can answer.
I have never felt so emotionally drained these past few weeks.
Our relationship isn't perfect but its more than enough perfect for me.
But he has hurt my heart.
I'm not sure how to process my emotions all over again.
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