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This has been so difficult for me to write but the truth is I don't love my boyfriend anymore. I have severe attachment issues and that is the only reason I don't break up with him but the truth still remains that I have fallen out of love with him. There are several reasons to it as well. One he never puts any effort in the relationship. I have been adjusting and compromising for him for almost an year now and yet he doesn't care enough about me. He doesn't want to go out and I am mostly always the one who has to travel every weekend to his place. He barely apologizes for his mistakes. He would rather find a way to blame it on me. I don't even feel comfortable sharing my thoughts with him. Moreover, he refuses to even hold my hand in public or even speak to me properly in public. This has me not wanting to go out with him anymore. The only reason I haven't left him is because at moments he has been there for me and I don't wanna hurt him. Moreover I don't really have anymore friends so if I leave him, I would all alone by myself. I feel so guilty for falling out of love but the more I stay here, the more intense the pain gets.
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you again?
hey there! how are you? I am writing after long. I thought, the chapter was closed. But after two weeks you messaged again. Last time you said, do whatever...
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Anyway, don't be a stranger
I hope you're doing well. I miss you and I grieve the love that we had everyday. I wish things were different. I'm sorry. If I knew our last time would come so...
Oh so itโs all his fault
ReplyWell, first, you already know what you should do about your boyfriend. If you've fallen out of love with him, you owe it to him to be honest about it whether it hurts him or not. The truth is he's probably feeling the same way if he doesn't seem interested in displaying public affection or like he isn't concerned with how you're feeling. He might even be staying with you for the same reasons too. But let me tell you, a true, worthwhile relationship is worth being alone to find. It might take some time but there is someone out there for you, even friendships come easier than you think. My advice is to break up with your boyfriend and take time for yourself, figure out what you're looking for in yourself and with a partner and start small. Maybe instead of jumping into another relationship, set a goal to make some girl friends and do something crazy like have a ladies night or something. Just because you're lonely now doesn't mean it'll be like this forever, so don't get discouraged. :)
ReplyOh my god my love! I was exactly in your shoes an year back and ended my 4 year relationship.
The guy just moved on to another girl in just 4 months, blaming me for everything.
Trust me honey! He will not understand the love you want him to understand. He will take everything on his ego and will move on. So the sooner you do it, the greater time you will get to heal out of it. It still hurts me seeing him being so practical about life and instead of putting in efforts or expressing his love, he simply will get going. So get out of it coz baby trust me - He won't change.
You can still give your last try in properly explaining and communicating to him all this and try to start fresh, but if he doesn't understand even then, get out of immediately coz this will cause you so much more pain.
ReplyThere is no point in investing in a relationship without love. And don't feel bad you fell out of love, it happens all the time. Be happy you did it before you got married. You don't have to date someone out of habit. And it's totally fine to break up because you're no longer into it. Just be kind. Don't point out faults. They don't even have to know all these things. Continuing on is not good for either of you. It does kinda sound like he's not that into you anymore either, which happens. Breaking up is hard to do and it takes a lot of courage. Start with 'this doesn't seem to be working out for either of us, how about we split for a bit and see how that goes'. As an old person looking back at my life, I am always happier when I don't have to deal with relationships. Being single is great.
ReplyWell with the way he's acting it seems like he's waiting for you to break up with him so he doesn't have to take any blame.......
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