I can't stand this fucking world

I hate this. I hate when I lose my friends to the world. I hate when they choose better and other people over me. I hate when they come back as if nothing ever happened. But you know I'm not that confrontational person so I let it happen. I don't tell them to go fuck off because I'm too afraid to let them know how I actually feel because everyone else will think I'm a fool. I hate the thought of trying to be perfect. What the fuck is perfect because fuck it I'm skinny, I thought I was pretty. I THOUGHT I WAS SOMEONE. but im not. And that's life because how I supposed to feel good enough when everyone around me compares to other people, how am I supposed to feel good enough watching other people walk around like they rule the world. But I can't feel like that because I'm helpless and worthless. I hate when people tell me that I'm not worthless or helpless, but where the FUCK do they go after telling me i'm worth shit. What kind of bs is this. I'm not anyone, or everyone or a someone. I'm a girl who's afraid to admit that she's scared of the world. I'm a teenager who's been through the bullies. I'm a 16 year old teenage girl who can't stand people treating her like a piece of shit. All I do for these people and I'm the problem. I'm a worthless piece of shit and I like it that way. Because the more I try to be someone I die inside. So don't make me feel like I'm someone because we all know you're lying. Don't tell me that I can do it because I tried. This is life. And I can't stand this fucking world