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So where do I even start? Well…I’ve never thought that my family had any financial problems…but I think that we’re in this situation now.
I kinda knew it for a while but I wasn’t really aware of it. I realized it only today when I asked my mother to buy me a sports bra…she asked me if I could wait till the next month because she doesn’t have enough money to pay for everything that is needed…she has bills to pay, food to buy and many other expenses. Obviously I told her that I could wait…it’s not like I’ll die without it. It’s just that I only have two actually supportive ones and I run 5 times a week so yeah…but even thought I need it I can survive without it so I don’t need it anymore.
I know that I’m a bad daughter and even though I’m well aware of it I’m not doing anything to change. I want to change. I know that I’m a pain in the ass but somehow I just keep making excuses for everything…it’s time to stop doing that.
Everything is expensive now…even food…and I’m a binge eater…I’ve been dealing with BED for years now and I can see that it got much better but I still binge sometimes…I know that I have to stop completely because I can’t even afford it…
I thought about going to a specialist but it also costs money :// because of my addiction I also gained some weight and some of my clothes are too small for me but I don’t want my parents to know…I don’t want to cause them so much trouble.
My education is also extremely expensive…I live in a dorm so my parents have to pay for it and for food to have sth to eat there. I also go to private lessons which costs more and more each year.
I have a brother who also attends school, private lessons and some kind of after school activities. He needs stuff to start a new school year + he’s still very young so he grows fast and needs new clothes all the time.
There’s also an upcoming school trip which I signed up for last year so I have to go now but it’s reaaaally expensive and it’s not even worth the money. I regret even wanting to take part in it.
After finishing my current school I’ll have to go to some kind of university and I’d like it to be a good one in a big city. Education itself is expensive and then there’re also living expenses like buying a flat or renting it or just buying food. Everything costs a lot.
There’s a lot more things that my parents have to pay for and there’re things that they’d like to do for fun and places that they’d like to visit…I really feel bad for them because I know that they sacrifice a lot for me and my brother.
I want to help them somehow. I need to do something but I don’t know what. I’m already trying to sell my old stuff and the ones that I don’t need anymore but it’s not enough. I thought about starting to work but I’m only 16 so it’s hard (if not impossible) to find a job that I could do after school at my age. If that’s not an option then maybe scholarship? I think I could do that…somehow…I have to study anyway so why don’t I just try a little harder? Or maybe I could take part in some kind of competition? I just need to study a lot for now…or is there anything else I could do?
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i think you should also think about the things that you are currently having for example, is your resources allowing you to join in competitions. This is actually a great insight for all of those things but of course having a job then having all of these expenses on your hands and it would also be much of a great help of having referrals and all of those things in order for you to have access on certain opportunities and I also would say that parents indeed have sacrificed a lot for us.
ReplyThe thing also with scholarships is that you would kinda hope you would be able to avail for one.
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