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You hurt me beyond belief, you have ruined me. You took something from me I can never get back. I hurt myself because of you, and the sad thing is the pain I inflict on myself helps me stop thinking of the pain you gave me, I can still feel you on me. I have no safe place because of you. I don't feel safe in my home, room, bed because of you. Why why would you do this and how the hell can I move on and heal?
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It was a moment in your life. Do not allow what happened to cheat you from the other moments of your life. There is still good in the world.
I've done this. Or at least, I've tried to. Personally, I took the risk of getting to know people. I didn't understand the point of knowing people, which was caused by early childhood trauma.
Someone taught me a lesson. They were amazing, and I kept them away from me. I missed out.
So, I decide to take the risk. I found people who I would trust with my life. They were worth the risk I took (and still take). Life has no guarantees though. I still find people who are not good. But you have to remember, the terrible ones I've met are worth the risk I took for the handful of people I trust.
This is not an easy thing I am suggesting you try. But if you don't try something different, you will stand still, and remain in the place you are in right now. And obviously, that is where you do not want to be.
You are your own savior, not anyone else. You are your safe place. Not your family, not your friends, not your therapist, not strangers, and most certainly not an anonymous stranger writing anonymously on the internet, it's you.
When you are about to cause yourself harm to escape, just think: "I cannot control what has been done to me, but I can control what I do to myself. I deserve better, so I will give myself better. I will try to give myself better."
If you take the risk, you are going to meet some rotten apples, but you are also going to meet the sweetest ones as well.
But, most of all, be kind to yourself. Be your own safe place.
ReplyWell, "trusting them with my life" is an exaggeration. People are fallible, myself included. But, you get the point.
ReplyGoing through same, sending love ❤️
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