Oh, how wretched that I am

Oh how wretched that I am. Stuck in this sinful body.

I resent myself.

I do the things of which I hate and disdain. I relate to Paul who groans as he writes, “For I do not understand what I am doing, because I do not practice what I want to do, but I do what I hate.”

I groan within myself knowing I can’t escape this shell of death. This body that haunts me, wages war with me and drags me down whenever it can. A shell of death I hold that encases the fleshly desires, trapping me, torturing me.

We have no idea how wretched we are! We are able to commit high treason against the Most High and the only thing keeping us alive is the mercy of God. Literally the only thing. We are despicable creatures who disobey the voice of God knowingly. We cannot even stop ourselves from spreading destruction everywhere. Our disgusting pride becomes so great that we may stand gloating not even noticing the weak. Our pride stares in satisfaction as our fellow neighbors sit in shame. How can we even call ourselves good if our actions say the total opposite?! An old saying I know, “Judge not a book by its cover but by its actions.” Well, let's look at the contents shall we? Sin. Disgraceful sin. There may be many good works in the contents but one tiny sin taints it all. Sin is that grievous that one sin can taint your whole story. What is sin? Transgression against the pure law. The law condemns all for breaking it.

It wasn't supposed to be this way but when man first disobeyed the words of God, the curse of sin spread quickly to all the descendants. Someone had to die for our wickedness. Not just a normal someone. No, sin demanded a holy, pure and sinless sacrifice to compensate for all the sorry, sick things we have done. Jesus Christ, the precious Son of God, had to suffer an agonizing death.

The least you could do is repent and follow God. To serve Him. He is amazingly good. More than that, He is truth and life itself! For if we reject God, we reject life and become dead. We separate ourselves from life so that we become the walking dead spreading the disease and curse of sin everywhere in everything we do, tainting everything.t

I must run to the only life there is left. Other supposed saviors are but crumbling rocks. They are lies. The only true light left is Jesus Christ alone. The only rock I have to stand on and cling to in this sick drowning world.