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In certain situations, while I can't generalize for every circumstance, one truth holds firm: attempting something endlessly, and yet finding it unyielding, is an undeniable indication. There's an unwavering reality that dictates the path you must tread. Revisiting conversations with your initial love might resurface a myriad of emotions—be it the fluttering of butterflies, the pang of anger, or the melancholy of "what if?" However, these sentiments can't alter the predetermined truth. That familiar, unsettling, and appetite-stealing nervousness is unmistakable—the sensation persists from my senior year to my late 20s, triggered by memories that momentarily grip my heart. I ponder whether he shares this sentiment, if he ever reflects on our shared past. Despite being young, our connection held significance, right? First love doesn't merely dissipate. It lingers through diverse life phases, relationships, and challenges, tucked away as a faint yet enduring memory. It reemerges unexpectedly, crystallizing once more in your thoughts. Despite countless attempts, when it's not meant to be, it simply isn't.
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It's hard when you hear their voice in your head a lot, can't talk to them cuz they think you're psychopathic and you just wanna know how they're doing after years of no communication when you guys used to be pretty close. I through a mental breakdown that lasted a bunch of years cuz I couldn't get insurance. No where wanted to hire. On top of that I became an alcoholic and said stupid things all the time. I have been going through many med changes for the last 5 years too. So I wasn't all there at all. I've gotten over the fact we will never be together but it'd still be nice to know how she's doing.
ReplyIf you wanted to bad enough, you would be talking to her and asking her.
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