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some little background info is that I've always had guy friends, since childhood, like I grew up with these guys and they're all like my brothers. They literally bully tf out of me (jokingly) and I've always liked that kind of relationship and nothing more. It may be hard to believe but that's what's happened. I've dated none of them and I'm 19 now. It just doesn't seem right. I'm honest in relationships, I'll say I don't cheat and I don't understand why people would. For others, I can't say the same. I've got cheated on 3 times and I've dated 8 guys. And for my guy friends, I'm lucky for them because they've talked to all of them and asked their reasons when I physically/mentally/socially couldn't. Those days of my life I felt so hurt, and they stepped up to talk, of course they went overboard where I did have to apologize to the cheaters for them. Of course that's totally messed up for them to go and fight him but sometimes it's just better to leave it alone. The longest relationship I have held is with my boyfriend now, proudly for 10 months, going strong!! Before my relationship with my current boyfriend cutting out cheaters, my guy friends have always made weird jokes while I was in relationship, I really had to yell at them to stop, because some didn't even know how to behave. When I got out of the relationship, after I became okay they still did it which then it was fine. Then they stopped after I got with my current boyfriend, I told them nicely to respect it and they did....for some time. 5 months in the relation they started to act all weird, saying dirty jokes, but I know they were kidding, but I didn't know if my boyfriend was gonna like all this, I told them that it was funny but go do it on some other girls. I have 3 close girl friends and I have 9 close guy friends. We're all really close, including the girls. Back to the point, I didn't really tell him because he knew since they would do it in front of him or either to him (yes you saw that right, guys make gay jokes even though they're straight, I can confirm). He laughs about it even when they say it to me but at some point he will tell them himself, that we're both getting uncomfortable. There was this time where they made a joke at me and I just laughed about it because to my head it was whatever, but to my boyfriend it wasn't, because I laughed they thought it was okay to do the next one, and I turned to my boyfriend and he's just watching me and he knew I felt uncomfortable and he felt the same. I didn't say anything because I didn't really know how to tell them to stop before they would do it all again like it was fine. It started to get dirtier by the minute, it was the jokes they would say when I was single, and my boyfriend spoke and was like "guys enough, I can't understand how you can make such dirty ass jokes in front of me or even at all knowing that she's taken. Yk I get jokes here and there but full on everyday, don't you get tired of this shit?" Then they all just stared at me, like I had to confirm all of this, and when I didn't say anything, one of my guy friends said "what" because they knew I was just holding it in so in that case I went off and said "okay ngl, I'm getting hella fucking tired of these jokes. When I was single you said it, which was totally okay, but when I'm with someone, I don't understand how you guys don't get common sense that maybe I'm just uncomfortable and telling you guys it's kinda hard because then you full on back away, you don't even speak to me." And I predicted it, they didn't speak much at all actually, I lost some friends along the way I used to have 3 close other guy friends I grew up with but that's alright. Then now, they've gone back to the jokes. 1 of the guy friends that left said something weird to me which they started using pickup lines. Then my other friend said a really dirty joke, then another said something that you just don't say to anyone. I told my boyfriend even though they all went out to get drunk, we found it weird that all 3 guys texted me. But it was confirmed they were drunk if you saw their snap stories, but all of that was 4 days ago so I don't care that nothing happened since and my boyfriend seems to be okay with it, but he said if it happens again, "he'll really talk to them".
FYI I'm the youngest my boyfriend is the oldest he's 23 and my friends are 19-22. Also the people that were drinking are 21-22, no one illegally drinks except 2 of my guy friends and for the girls they don't drink at all, since we're the same age and because they think it's gross.
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These so called friends don't respect you at all and treat you like a joke because they get away with it. They are immature and aren't really friends at all. They are in a group so when they are with you they have a group mentality where they all behave the same way. You shouldn't allow yourself to be the subject of their dirty jokes and if you have respect for yourself and your boyfriend you won't have anything more to do with them. Keep to your girlfriends.
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