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My situation is ridiculous. Why though ?
I am a 17 year old girl who likes that same boy for 3 years straight. You might wonder how it is possible to have such a long term crush (it is quite embarassing) , but when the first year passes it becomes an everyday matter , you just get used to it. That boy is one of my classmates , so I cannot avoid his presence , which means that whenever I think that I have gotten over him , I catch feelings within the same month.
Lately , I had the impression that all this situation was finally over , but of course today everything started again. As a person I am shy , so we do not really interact , which makes me think that if we interacted we could end up together. Living with the thought that there is a possibility to get together with him is what prevents me from stop liking him. I have concluded that the only way to put an end is to learn if that 'door' is open or closed , so I do not have to wonder and daydream. The uncertainty grows inside me and freaks me out. I can't confess my feelings or approach him directly , it is out of my character , I would mess it up . If he liked me he would have tried to make a move , but he seems completely uninterested.
Today , I came to the realisation that we will not end up together and felt an intense sadness. I know that it is not necessary to be liked by everyone , regardless of your physical appearence or personality... if there is not chemistry even if I am beautiful and intelligent he will not ever choose me. So why did I chose him ?
I considered him to be really smart and calm. I loved that we were both artistic people and kind of funny. He was attractive (physically) too. I have perfected some of his flaws even though I am totally aware of them. I do not even know what to do .
I try to communicate whith him , but I feel that I should let him and my feeling go. I won't go after a person that does not want to be with me.
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In my humble experience the best most exhilarating kind of romantic love is where the boy chases the girl. So long as you are physically and emotionally available - romantic love is always around the corner from season to season and tends to appear when you least expect it. Best of luck.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow, including the teachings of Christ Jesus. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required, although the former and latter are admirable if practiced freely out of one's own free will and without the threat of being beheaded. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Mark 12:28-31
And Christ Jesus said the 2 greatest commandments are:
Love God first and foremost.
Love your fellow-being as you love yourself.
From following or not following these, all good or evil cascades, respectively.
Love...that powerful, invisible, intangible force that cannot be denied; even atheists live and die by it.
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