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I'm suffering from suicidal thoughts, i can't get myself to do something even though i know it is important pr it is necessary, i get distracted very easily and just delay all the task and at the end can't complete any of them and i end up feeling like loser, all i want is to do something good in my life that my parents don't need to worry about financial things and be proud of me and it can't be possible without me working hard but i just can't start , I'm to scared to fail that i just give up before trying it amd if i start and get stuck that i get stressed that i am going to fail , I'm weak in studies that's what i feel and still chose a degree that is academically challenging for me and i can't understand what to do, i always feel stupid around everyone and because of that i avoid talking much and i just can't make nee connection because i always feel that I'm either stupid or annoying and to be honest i actually have no friends in my life like everyone else, and somehow i feel i just don't deserve to live, but i can't die because all i want is to make my parents proud for real at least once before i die, i just don't know what should i do where should i start from and the problem is because of all this fears and insecurity l can't focus on and that makes me feel stupid because i can't understand the simple things, or i will do something stupid or be extremely impulsive , well can't really understand what to do and this is going on from 4/5 years now i did achieve few things and I'm grateful for that but still can't get out of this weird shell which is way to dark and scary and makes me feel like i just have way to get out of this...
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Okay. I’m a bit older than you. Take a deep breath. Listen. I have disappointed my parents. I never became what they wanted me to be, and they never really accepted who I am. It’s great you want to make your parents happy. But you are who you are and you have your own limitations. You are not a loser. You may not be suited for the degree you have chosen. I urge you to think again about choosing something which won’t make you feel this way, something you can understand and succeed at. My prayers are with you friend.
ReplyYou are just a person. None of us are perfect. Do your best and move on. That's all anyone can ask of us.
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