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U broke up with me yesterday after school. Today is our 2 months. Even tho we dated short time. It feels like I’ve known u my entire life tbh.
I just wish u knew if u wanted a relationship or not before u asked me to be ur girlfriend. And now I have to go and see u in class today.
There is so much I want to say to u. But it help what trust you broke. U told me u wouldn’t leave. Only 12 days ago. 5 days ago u said u loved me.
Maybe I am naive. For trusting again. But I’ll be ok. Having my mom walk out in my life hurt. But I manage. I always do.
I am trying so hard not to cry. I got rid of everything. And our pictures. Even the cute videos I made of us. I can’t delete them from recently deleted.
I can’t block you. I need u. But I’m not going to cry today. They say the 2nd day is the hardest. I won’t let u see it. I promise myself that.
U know the trauma of my mom leaving me. We have talked about u leaving me and u promised. Why make promises u can’t keep? I have questions that fill me with anxiety but it won’t help knowing the answers.
Again although it’s been 2 months. We got close in the 5 months of us talking. Every. Single. Day. U brought out a part of me nobody has really seen. Parts I haven’t seen. I’m very introverted. But with u.. I never was. I would fucking sing with u.
U broke up with my respectfully. I guess I have to be appreciative of that. But it’s not fair. It’s not fair.
My friends say I’m to pretty for u anyways. But it’s not about how pretty I am and how u look.
I already miss the way u tell me how dramatic I am when I say something hurts and it doesn’t. Or u constantly teasing me about my math skills. I miss our laughs. Ur hugs. Ur hands. I miss saying ur name. I miss ur laugh. Laughing at and with me. I just wish u didn’t have to act weird in the end.
Just wish u let me have one more day being ur girlfriend without subconsciously knowing it was over.
But ig i prepared myself a bit. But it still hurt. And the tears barely stopped. And going to sleep was hard.
But it’s been 30 minutes since I started this letter.
I told myself I wouldn’t cry. But it’s harder said than done tbh.
So I’ll see u later. But u won’t see me crying. I promise myself that. Not in front of u.
Goodbye
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