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A little background before I get into this me and my fiance have a friend who we will call Jj and JJ has a bad habit of going to strip club
Well yesterday me and my fiance were talking about how much more worse JJ attitude has gotten how he always says he doesn't have money to help with this that or the other (which we don't ask for much money) to spot the difference on food we duy for they house if me my fiance our other roommate cants finish paying other than that we don't ask for money anyways my fiance had texted me asking "Hey baby is it okay if I go to strip club with JJ I just wanna see how much he spends there cuz it's starting to get worrying" I agreed with him on days off JJ just bounces back and forth between 3 clubs for his days off and will stay there all day so I told him "Sure baby I don't mind" so they came home set their work stuff down and before leaving my fiance kissed my forehead like every time before he leaves well the hours pasted and we ended up getting a small storm ( I'm really scared of thunder) so as I'm trying my hardest to stay relax led and texting my fiance many times saying I'm scared (he knows how I am with thunder) I never got a reply back his phone was really close to dying well they finally get home and I was just over joyed to have my fiance back he tells me almost instantly that he got a lap dance from stripper I wish I was lying when I tell you it felt like the world stopped I just kinda stood in place looking at him and he keeps talking about it kinda smiling saying how there was 2 older men payed for him and JJ to get danced on he looks at me and finally asked what was wrong the only thing I could say was "And you accepted it?" He said yeah and kept talking about it and so I kinda got into my emotions and said "You let another girl on your lap when you don't even let me sit on your" he sat on the bed and asked "Come here then" I told him no and that he needed to shower cuz I wasn't going I walked out our room and started cleaning the already cleaned house to keep my mind busy and he tells me " If it makes you feel better I felt uncomfortable after a bit" I did the only thing I knew best for me to not start yelling I ignored him JJ and the other roommate now I know I'm gonna get comments saying "well if you didn't want him getting dances why tell him he go" etc thats not the part that really hurt it's the fact that he gone there before and full on slapped a strippers hand away for trying to touch him and said no I'm taken so I know he could have gone without being touched by them but the fact he didn't tell the older men " No I'm engaged and this is cheating" is what hurt the most
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he slapped a strippers hand away? Before? You saw him? Or did he just tell you that?
ReplyI saw him do it so I know he is very well able to tell them no
ReplyI saw him do it
ReplyYou're not going to like what I have to say but the truth is that you and your fiance have DIFFERENT VALUES. Different values is a big deal in a relationship. Your values do not align. You are heading for a troubled marriage. Go on, marry him, but you're making a big mistake. The warning signs are already there and you're not even married. Do some thinking over feeling and you will realise I am telling you the truth.
ReplyThere is no right or wrong. What matters is what YOUR values are. You are entitled to have different values to other people.
ReplyNo it isn't cheating. He didn't cheat. If it were cheating he'd be seeing that girl/woman on a daily basis talk text etc without your knowledge. And he admitted what happened right? Its just a business. They're in it for the money most times that's it. Clearly he loves you but yes I would be offended too. Sure he needed to see how much this jj spent if he claims to not have money when you all could use it. I think JJ is a sponge and your fiance cares about you or he wouldn't have told you period what happened. You both need to talk it out.
Reply