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What really means to be free?
I consider myself as someone who is not free, because even in my sleep I worry. To be subjected at the outside agents, to worry about what could happen if you don't maintain your composure, or if you don't do it this or that way, does that make you a slave of the system?
Some days, like today, I wanna just say "fuck it" and not worry about a thing; funnily enough, not much seems to change. If I still get worried for potentially bad things happening in some degree or another, could I say I'm really free? I mean, any smart person would try to prevent bad things from happening, so then are we slaves to the system?
Can we ever be free using mindset alone? Can we be free if we truly convince ourselves that we are free? What is to be free? I don't feel free; I feel like at the time of writing this, I'm taking too many pauses in between each sentence, whereas other people don't have these chains put on, but I struggle so much to not make mistakes.
Any given moment should be called freedom; to be free is to break the chains, and to break the chains is to let it all out until the handicap you created in your mind gets gone. To me, freedom is something I longed for my whole life, to be able to say goodbye to every obligation I had and every lock I put myself mentally for all these years.
But it happens in the life of every person or living being that we get tired and give up searching freedom because we become conformed and lifeless and we stop trying. Is life really worth living then? If we die, might as well not be, but with every dream comes hope... hope that one day we might achieve something greater.
I just want to be free, to be able to say fuck it and stop being mentally stuck forever and ever more.
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