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I'm so fed up with today and just overall this whole week. Nothings gone to plan, and I've just been all over the place. I was okay at school today but I just I felt so odd as soon as I was home and then these little things that occurred just set me off and now my ma's blaming it ALL ON ME even tho it was all my older brother's fault. Then I've got this repetitive cycle of getting jealous of people I wish I was, and its so fucking draining and its never ending. Only time it stops is when they make changes to themselves that no longer makes me wanna be them anymore and that hasn't happened. There's this one girl and shes just so pretty its unbelievable and her skin is so clear too. I'm here struggling with oily but dry skin, blemishes, redness, and god knows what sort of spots that even pimple patches won't get rid of. She usually applies moisturiser THROUGHOUT the day too, especially at the end of school, but still she has no spots? Not that I wish she gets spots, I just wish my skin was like that. Honestly I just wish I was prettier, I'm so tired of my mindset. Crazy how you don't realise what people are struggling with. My heads hurting, I feel so unmotivated, I feel disgusting and just ugly and stupid and as if I dont belong, and I'm probably gonna miss my religious class again which is just greaaatt and on top of all this I've got a diff girl at school really bugging me like I CANNOTT with her anymore. I just feel empty inside and I dont know what to do to feel normal again
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