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is it just me who like, I feel so upset for that fact that I need to go back home in 3 days. I'm in a different country, it was supposed to be a family holiday but my ma couldn't make it due to something else going on. And now when I only have 2-3 days left of my holiday i just feel like crying my eyes out. I haven't been on holiday in almost a decade and like now that I finally got to come im thankful, I really am, but I wish my ma came along. I just wish that I could stay here forever. No need to worry about school, get up and take my time getting ready, be thankful that I've got a whole hotel room to myself, thankful that my room is so nice, thankful I got the chance to atleast be able to go on a balcony with a sea view and a pretty night city view when dark. I just want a stress free life and I feel like I could achieve that if I stayed here, even tho half of this trip has been ANYTHING but peaceful. Yet again, I'd get bored ofc. But still. It's like my attachment issues decided to just appear again, I get attached to people easily and it like they've left a hole in ur heart once they've left u. Its the same with this holiday. You might be like "omg thats not even that deep, its js a holiday" yeah a holiday that didn't seem to go perfectly but I still somewhat enjoyed my time here, and I just wanna live here man. I don't wanna go back to school, I dont wanna EVER see those people ever again, I dont wanna see the people I know again, I just wanna live a peaceful life. I hope one day, whether or not I've completed my dermatologist course or not, ill move to a pretty islamic country with a decently sized home and a nice view. I just hope I capable of doing so. And having an amazing husband with me too would probably be the cherry on top.
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