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maybe its js me or this app takes FOREVER to load, like I'm js tryna type out my thoughts while sobbing, why the hell do I have to wait so long? anyway, I just feel so disappointed in everything, and especially myself, but I feel as if it isnt my fault. I haven't been getting much sleep due to Ramadan, (prayer times are so late I CANNOT GET ENOUGH SLEEP.) And my parents are upset with me since I've missed quite a lot of school. But its like, if I had a kid I'd try be understanding, I'd try get them to pray on time so that they'd possibly have enough energy to get to school, I'd create a peaceful environment and probably treat them out so that they're in a good mood. So how the hell is this my fault? Its difficult, I mean I struggle sleeping. Takes me an hour or two to sleep, and after prayer its like 10pm. Then gotta wake up at 3am again, (to have sehri= last meal b4 fasting) and after I cant sleep because its 4am, and then I pray, 5am, then its basically time to get ready for school again. How the hell is everyone managing except me? I'm just so done. You've got my mother screaming at my brother to come down, and how she 'won't wake anyone up tommorrow' and u know damn well SHE IS GONNA WAKE US ALL UP. No problem if she doesn't, I wake up on my own anyway. But its like so early in the morning, I dont wanna hear anyone complaining about someone not coming down. If they wanna fast, they'll come to eat. And she had the audacity to tell me that my future's ruined atp just because I haven't been to school for half a week. Like leave me alone. I cried last night after praying rather than sleeping I dont know whats got into me I just suddenly was reminded of a loved one's death and started sobbing uncontrollably. Feeling mentally drained, and guess what? It's only the 3rd day of fasting. Why's it always me whos falling apart in one way or another? Is my future really ruined over a few days off??
(Dont want any comments telling me to 'think abt switching religions' THANKS.)
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Allah will forgive you if you take a few days off. I think you could go out somewhere around nature, take deep breaths and just rest? Sorry if this is useless. But you can also use different essential oils, researching about one that helps for mentally deprived feelings.
I hope you find this useful.
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