I hate Social Media and I'm Irritated by people

I'm not writing this for anyone other than myself, but I'd like to have something to come back to anytime I get optimistic and or get my hopes about someone ever again. I'm from the millennial population and wow, let me start off by saying how much I dislike the boomer generation and how they truly fucked up generation X and my generation too.

I'm a very confident woman and I'm well-rounded. I did everything that I was told to do by the boomer generation to only be outcasted and be labelled as intimidating. I participated in the programs and all of those extra curriculars in the hopes of attaining some sort of foundation and every single boomer including my own fucking parents have messed me up and or ensured that additional hurdles were created for me. Now these assholes don't want to retire and I'm stuck possessing all of the credentials that I needed for those positions, but I have no career LOL ain't life funny?

Now, I was active on MSN, but I truly believe that all other social platforms should've never came into existence. MSN should've been the last and alright fine, I'll be generous and give facebook an extended grace. The internet is a tool that is to provide assistance to us and it's unfortunate that many people utilize it for bullshit. Keeping tabs up on people that they don't like and or aren't interested in being around. They compare themselves to others without getting context of anything. It's created this very arrogant attitude that many people have adopted into believing that the grass is always greener on the other side. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS CAN YOU MEN STOP ASKING FOR PICTURES!!!! STOP ASKING FOR PICTURES!! STOP ASKING FOR PICTURES!! STOP ASKING FOR PICTURES!!! STOP...ASKING...FOR...PICTURES FUCK! I had a guy ask me to send pictures of myself and I declined, but when I asked him to do a quick video chat - THAT became an invasion of his privacy. I'm not speaking for the exceptions here because it happens too often. I understand that men and women are wired differently, but seriously when the fuck are you men going to realize that if you've been utilizing this picture tactic and still don't have what you're looking for...STOP FUCKING DOING IT!! I'm not sending you my pictures so I can be included in your collage of pictures with random ass women that you can show to your friends and or jerk off too. Go and buy the material for that shit. More than half of these guys complain about women not looking like their profile picture and you think it still makes sense to ask for pictures, but when a woman asks for a quick video chat <<<this is way more invasive LOL WHAT THE FUCK??

I've been called intimidating by men for simply basking in my own existence. I never asked them to pay for anything and I never conducted myself in an arrogant fashion, but for some reason a lot of you guys just really move your mouth and the shit just moves from one side of your mouth to the next. This illusion of having more options than you think is really annoying and this is why dating has become so difficult. There are too many people lacking in the self awareness department and they're just repeating what sounds good to them, but not seeing if it matches with their actual desires. The amount of men who expected me to make things easier for them when I simply explained my standards, like buddy...if you don't like what's on your screen then change the fucking channel! Why are you men so damn desperate for attention that you can't just be honest?

I don't entertain guys that I'm not interested in AT ALL! I'm not afraid of being alone because after all....I WAS BORN ALONE AND I WILL DIE ALONE! Why don't people understand this concept???

The men are always complaining about how they don't care for a woman's position and or her degrees...well that's also a lie as well. When you're not asking them for money and or assistance, they're skeptical of you LOL BUT WHEN YOU DO ASK FOR MONEY AND OR ASSISTANCE, THEY'RE STILL SKEPTICAL OF YOU LOL I CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP.

I'll save my other post about friendships because I'm so sick and tired of these lying ass women categorizing all women together. I'm not a slave to my genitals, I'm celibate and I have no qualms with that. But these silly ass chics that demand sex and then insist on hanging out with me and or being my friend....sweetie? Let's be real, you have no hobbies and indulge in all of the unhealthy actions of social media, posting thirst trap pictures and leading guys on to only turn around and complain that men only want you for your body....have you seen your feed? Butt pics and boob pics...why the fuck are you surprised? Then you wanna come into my space and constantly talk about sex (by the way, I'm not a prude but if we're not going to discuss the importance of SEXUAL HEALTH then I don't care to be apart of the conversation. If we're not going to exchange experiences to keep learning about sex, our partners, ourselves and much more then I don't care.) I'm not interested in hearing how much of a boring bedmate you are. I'm not impressed by the number of men that you sleep with and this goes for men too. I don't care about your sexual partners - I MEAN QUALITY OVER QUANTITY and speaking from experience!! THOSE SO CALLED PLAYERS WERE ALWAYS THE ONES WHO WERE TRASH IN BED! HANGING LONG FOR NO REASON BECAUSE THEY COULDN'T EVEN REALLY GET INTO MOTION. BORING IN BED BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEMSELVES AND OR UNDERSTAND THEIR OWN DAMN BODY.

You know what's sexy to me? Being able to share your last STI check up. Fuck, I'd even take an invite to the sexual health clinic so we can be clear about ourselves, but I'm telling you. I never thought that the world could break me, but it has. I'm so tired of people (men and women). I'm so tired of social media. I'm so sick of being an outcast in a world where nothing makes sense and leaves me questioning what was my purpose of being brought into this world because I'm not able to teach anyone anything because I'm being called intimidating.

I never knew that being able to enjoy your own solitude would cause an uproar among men and women. I've had both genders beg to be my friend and or within my space. I've been polite and respectful when rejecting people and that's only led to having stalkers LOL YES MEN AND WOMEN FOR WHATEVER FUCKING REASON.

I have hobbies and I enjoy them so much, but not many people possess hobbies. LISTEN IF YOU HAVE TO MAKE EXCUSES ALL OF THE TIME FOR YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILLS - YOU'RE NOT AN EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATOR. I AM TIRED OF PEOPLE ASKING FOR MY NUMBER AND THEN JUST DISAPPEARING ONCE YOU GIVE IT TO THEM. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS CAN YOU MEN AND WOMEN FUCKING ACCEPT THAT YOU WERE BORN ALONE AND WILL DIE ALONE. I swear the pandemic has people fucked up and wanting them to just keep placeholders and it's coming from a scarcity mindset. How many people lack social graces and proper etiquette. My goodness, there are days that I ask myself, am I even supposed to fucking be here? I've never belonged and or fit in from day one and it hasn't gotten any better.

So...to the last guy that I attempted to date...you're too old to be blowing hot and cold. You presented yourself as a respectable character, but your actions didn't align with anything. You also asked for pictures and I couldn't understand why because there was barely a conversation. I mean let's break it down logically. If there are several social media platforms and a plethora of social media models or whatever the fuck they're called...why do you need a picture of me? and lets be real, I'm also not the first woman that you've asked...so are you not just collecting pictures of women and not grasping the concept of a conversation being important? Yes, looks are important but if you've been asking for pictures and there's been no progress WHY ARE YOU STILL LEADING WITH THIS? You were expressive in the beginning and this is why I have a beef with so called shy people. WHEN YOU COME ACROSS SOMEONE WHO'S A CONVERSATIONALIST AND WHO'S TRYING TO MAKE THINGS EASIER FOR YOU TO COMMUNICATE...SHY PEOPLE YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO WORK WITH THOSE INDIVIDUALS. GEEZ!!! IT'S LIKE PULLING TEETH AND THEN WHEN YOU SAY FUCK IT, THEY POP BACK UP AND WONDER WHAT HAPPENED.

THE WAY PEOPLE ARE SO DESPERATE NOW HAS ME DEFEATED. FUCK THIS SHIT FORRREAL. YOU GUYS WIN. THE WORLD WINS. I JUST CAN'T ANYMORE.

Nobody wants to practice humility and admit when they don't know something. Nobody wants to take accountability.

Nobody wants to be honest anymore. I even stated that we were both adults and I was cool with being rejected. I have no issues with that, but I do have problems with being a placeholder to someone because I DON'T DO THAT SHIT WITH ANYONE! The way some of you men are so fucking desperate is alarming.

Social media you win. I can't do this anymore because it has truly served no benefit to me and as much as I've tried to help, I haven't even received the short end of the stick to be angry LOL.

I dated for years and I even took breaks in between to regroup and whenever I came back it was worse than the last time. I'm going to be 30 this year and I've already experienced so much between being engaged, the death of my loved ones, recovering from my motor vehicle accident, being sexually assaulted, being harassed, living independently and finishing post secondary education. I've travelled by myself, I was always the supportive friend who attended all of their events, but none of them could ever reciprocate the same and or even a fraction of that. I have no kids, I exercise and eat well. I have a great personality and a very dark and weird sense of humour. Please don't think that I'm perfect nor am I striving to be perfect. I just ask for people to be themselves and that's always been a struggle. As the saying goes: "Don't let my confidence rattle your existence"<<I'm paraphrasing here.

I thought things would've been different with this last one, but I can't anymore and I give up.

I've finally accepted that I won't ever get married and that I won't ever have any children and you know what? There's actual relief! I'm not interested in dating anymore and I'm not interested in formulating any kind of friendship etc.

My best friend died 5 years ago and it's been hell even trying to meet up with a potential platonic person for coffee. The one relative that I grew up with was murdered. The last standing friend that I went to school with has suffered from too many concussions and doesn't even remember me. I have no family and not a single friend, but I still chose and choose to wake up never wearing any of those issues on my face and or sleeve.

This is one of the shittiest sets of cards that I've ever been given.

Oh well, at least I'll be able to fully engage in everything that I've ever wanted. Writing, reading, horseback riding, more solo travelling, painting, drawing, make up, playing instruments, taking more pictures and just really living an active life LOL you know the one that I've been doing that makes people intimidated by me. So now that I know that I'll always be alone and on my own level...I really don't even need to engage with any of you and at least I won't have to share any weed and or liquor! Those one woman parties really hit different and now I can just draw all of the individuals on a sheet of paper, tape them to my wall, get my coloured lightbulb, smoke and drink in my own space while playing music.

That's more than enough for me with all of the bills paid, savings and some entertainment money. Nas said it, "Life Is Good".