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Be kind.
I wanted to open my heart here and tell things tell how I spoiled my marriage how I lost my husband who is my love and my friend.
Being in marriage for so long makes you sometimes do the worst things. My marriage was not perfect nor was my husband. Infact I always used to hate him even if he didn't do anything. The anger and hate on him was something which I used to carry everyday with me. That being said we still used to talk laugh and play around with our daughters, it was just that I was not into him somehow. He is not a bad person but for me he was. He was everything that I hate. I used to regret marrying him. That is why I didn't have any physical relationship with him after our daughters were born. But I am human too somehow the urge for sex and physical relationship was boiling in me for sometime. That is when I met a old friend with whom I used to hang around. After such a long time felt like my body wanted something and without realizing it, I cheated on my husband. I never thought what would happen later. My husband came to know about this and since then he has not spoken to me , doesn't make any eye contact with me or even touches me. I feel so embarrassed and so ashamed I did this because I always thought I hated him and never wanted him to be around me. i realized how wrong I was when there is so much silence between us now. I miss his talks, his way of making me laugh and everything now I miss about him. My apologies to him doesn't mean to solve the wrong I did.. I just hope he forgives me and comes back to me the way he was. I am so sorry my dear for doing all this. I miss you so very much. I love you.
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Sometimes being in a routine and comfortable for so long we get use to it then bored. We don't see the cute and sweet anymore. We find the annoying and the turn off. We lose the excitement. I don't know if it's after having kids and being a mother raising kids, our body changing, spending so much of our time being a mother, and wife that we forget who we are as an individual, so we start spiraling? I can see the urge for excitement and newness of a relationship of feeling wanted and pleasured. But, then again I can also see the what's at home, the look and emotions that they would feel. I know that you wish you could take it back. We make mistakes and not all people make the same mistakes. I hope that he can find it in his heart to forgive you and you can work it out.
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