What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
I've reached a point in my life where it feels like I have no purpose anymore or rather I've never had one, all I do is wake up, go to uni, come back home, eat, sleep and repeat this routine all over again, I'm really just on auto pilot and it makes me sick both physically and mentally, nothing brings me genuine joy anymore.
It might come off as cliché, but there are times when I can physically feel a void inside myself and that's when I want to end it all the most just so I could stop feeling this miserable because it has become so unbearable and exhausting living like this. I know it's up to me to turn my life around and do better (it's even worse when you're aware of this and can't bring yourself to do anything, it makes me feel even more pathetic and useless), but I'm so afraid and uncomfortable of putting myself out there, I feel like I'm not adequate and deserving enough so I'd rather just rot away because I've been familiar with this miserable state of being for so long... I'm just a shell of the person I used to be and I'm scared I'll never feel at peace with myself ever again.
To top it all off there's this feeling that I don't have much time left to live and it's frightening because all I've done lately is existing instead of living. I don't know if it's the anxiety that comes with the free time, but I hate feeling like this and I have no one to turn to and ask for advice, my mom would just panic if she heard me talking like this so I'd rather not stress her out more than she already is, and as for close friends I don't have any left, they're just mere aquaintances so all that's left is writing here. If you've read this jumbled mess of my thoughts then thank you, have a wonderful day/night!
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Hellish day
You are staring at someone having a crisis for the day about someone who is about to enter that hideous 30 year old cap... it's just that time in the life. Toda...
-
Life is messy but so is my brain
My brain at this time 9:06p.m. Central time, feels numb like I’m tired yet it’s fully awake. It’s very unusual how the mind of mine is thinking. I must...
Jesus is there. I know that. He's real. He helped me with pornography. I felt trapped and I cried out to Him and He helped. I know my pain is nothing compared to yours, but He knows. He knows everything. And no, it's not his fault that someone raped you. As you know people are evil but not God. He just wants to heal you. He's only waiting for you. That person chose to hurt you and trust me, if they choose to keep doing evil without repenting, God WILL judge them. But for now, He is giving every single human being a chance to turn to him. You can ask Him if you have more questions, but He did write the Bible to answer almost all of your questions. You can escape. There is a way. Jesus did say, "I am the way, the truth and the life." And no, I don't write this to be all like, "Join my religion." I only write this because He saved me from something I thought I could NEVER escape, and I got SO desperate that I cried out to Him. I waited for and answer and lo and behold, I had no more desire for that sin. I was free. It's all right my man.
ReplyI understand the sentiment, but nowhere in my post did I say that I was sexually assaulted, I think you interpreted what I said entirely wrong
Replyim proud of you.
it takes a lot of bravery to open up like this, im going through the same thing, you are not alone
Reply