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I've read somewhere that a person who doesn't have long-lasting friendships is a red flag. Now, I do understand some parts of it, but it still echoes in my mind.
I was always surrounded by friends, from kindergarten through primary school, in high school and now in uni. But the levels of these friendships always change after a big (lifestyle) change. My primary school best friend stopped being my best friend after going to high school, the high school girlfriends group slowly disintegrated when going to uni, and now the friendship with my best friend from uni also stopped feeling "the best" after I went to another country as an exchange student.
I see myself as a very good friend and I also try to be. I do understand we change when we go to different schools or jobs or cities but there is a certain feeling of uncertainty and doubt when I think that the majority of people are in your life just for a certain time. Is it possible to change without having "consequences" on your friendships?
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holding onto friends that impact you/ your life/your developement negatively is a red flag so yeah i dont agree with that first line
ReplyI think adults who are still friends with the same people from school most of the time just never grew up. 25 year old plus adults who’s closest friends are from highschool are much more often then not still doing the same HS things. Sure there’s some unicorns out there that’s true, most of them just never grew up. I’m 28yo and have zero friends from school. Why? We grew apart, I lived my unique life just like they did. I don’t think you should worry about that red flag. Live your life how you want and the rest will fall in line. You and your HS friends are still friends at say age 26, that’s great. If you made new connections that better suit your interests then that’s great too.
ReplyI am an older adult and I had a friend for thirty years and our friendship finished because she died. I also had a friendship with a man and his mother for more than twenty years and the mother grew old and died and a while later the son had a heart attack and died. I have had many other friends during that time as well. I don't know why not having a long lasting friend is a red flag. I have never heard of this.
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