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I'm getting help due to certain things, so just trigger warning about wanting to/almost stopping own life, depressive episodes, etc
recently I let all kinds of things out. my mother heard me as I told her about these extreme mood swings, wanting to "leave" life, self hatred for no reason, and that I just love her and my whole family too much to let it continue. she's helped me to get some help. the episodes were getting worse as I said to her, and with potential other sicknesses contributing. all is underway.
but yeah like all will be ok. but she is worried as hell. I know why and I get it. though I don't want to worry her so much. she has so many things to worry about and do already and I feel like I've said too much. I love her so much, and how she cares so much makes me realise what I really have to live for.
but how can I help make things feel easier for her? I just love her so much and I don't want to let her worry and not have me help her
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Keep reassuring her that you are getting the help that you need and you will be alright.
ReplyDo not seek the end, please. The end will find us all, on its own with no assistance from us. The sun sets, but it also rises. Stay strong, and like you say - live for her. In my humble opinion - you can make things easier for her by assuring her everyday that you are fine, assure her everyday. Best of luck.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow, including the teachings of Christ Jesus. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required, although the former and latter are admirable if practiced freely out of one's own free will and without the threat of being beheaded. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Mark 12:28-31
And Christ Jesus said the 2 greatest commandments are:
Love God first and foremost.
Love your fellow-being as you love yourself.
From following or not following these, all good or evil cascades, respectively.
Love...that powerful, invisible, intangible force that cannot be denied; even atheists live and die by it.
Mary, Mother of Christ, intercede for us with your prayers, now, and always.
And after our worst deeds - never forget God forgives us when we repent through Christ Jesus, when we change our minds and our actions.
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