What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
At the start of 2024, I decided to take a break from aiming and re-taking the bar exam. I instead told myself to focus on finding work and start on building a career path which I should have/could have done maybe four years ago (before I entered law school).
6 months passed, I could not land a job. I tried applying, even took an exam for the same job application, didn't make it. Had interviews but did not qualify. I was honestly losing hope when it is already July 2024 which is my birth month. Why? I am hoping for a different birthday this year, like I dont want to write an email to myself 12 in the midnight just to rant things and let out all the emptiness i feel because it's been like that for at least 2 or 3 years. I may have celebrated my birthdays looking okay but deep inside, I am heartbroken, not because of love but because I felt empty with no clear direction in life after trying and failing the bar. It was also in the first week of July that I decided to pull out and give up the boarding house in Iloilo city since I have been trying to get work there but nothing happened. For me, I just wasted my mother and sisters' money. I told myself to look for a job in my hometown to lessen the expenses. Thankfully, 2 days before returning home from Iloilo, I received a call. They told me that there is an orientation on Monday. I think it was fri/Saturday when they called me. I was confused because it was a different offer from what I applied for and to think that during the interview I had, it felt like I had a slim chance of entering their office since they preferred their people. Anyway, I grabbed that opportunity and yes, I now have a job although the time is limited but at least I can experience working.
To connect with the title, my job is of course, it had to do with my educational background which is why i cannot soul search without having to face anything law-related. I am a legal assistant and as much as i wanted to avoid talking about the bar exams, things about law school and to work with people who passed the bar, it's just impossible. But as time goes by, I feel better talking about it and not just avoid it. My coworkers are also like me but they're much older and wiser, who probably were also disappointed that they didnt pass the bar. Yet, it doesn't stop them from doing great things with what they currently have, a Juris doctor degree. That's what I am working on, being able to be proud that I survived law school and even if i dont have the "a.t.t.y." yet, I am qualified to do other things. Honestly, I missed hearing legal terms. I'm surprised since I still understand those. When we talk, it felt like i belonged to the group. I thought I wouldnt.
Reflecting on all of these, I guess i can say that it is time to confront my fears. I failed the bar exam...? so what? it already happened. I just have to move on and probably take it again in the future. I dont know when exactly. If I enjoy drafting petitions, learning and understanding real life conflicts, would it be alright to say I want to pursue the bar again? would it be the right decision?
anyway, I still got time to work on myself. I will focus on a career path that i am currently taking. It takes time. Everything does.
I hope that whoever reads this finds inspiration.
I know I cannot overcome fears unless I face them head on.
And I hope you also confront them...maybe not now, but soon.
For now, just breathe.
Let your feelings flow and take your time to know yourself.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
The inspiring country, China
China is a well - developed country in East Asia. This country inspiring me a lot to think about the life in a positive, energetic way. Being a young citizen of...
-
a moment in time
there is a family sitting together on the pier a Dad and a Mom and their son the Dad is on the left both of his legs are dangling off the edge he is holdin...