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Got into an argument with my mom, and I went to my room and cut myself with a knife. Put a bandaid on it, and went back to apologise. She said she was sorry and that it didn't matter. I feel like an idiot. I got shouted at for all the right reasons, and I needed to punish myself. But I should've gone deeper. I feel worse knowing that my mom loves me so much and I'm like this. She deserves a better daughter. I'm just worthless. Apparently the only thing I can do is cut myself now. I convinced myself that I was gonna stop three days ago. It's not happening. Fuck myself. Fuck it. I should go die. I hate myself. I don't deserve the good things in my life. I'm a fucking weakling that can't take the slightest stress. And again, because I'm a coward, I cant cut deep or end it. I'm sure I'll feel fine in a few hours, but this feeling never fully goes away. It's always gonna come back. It's pointless. I should go do something useful right now. I wish I could just die and have no one worry about it.
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