Fantasy ..but will this happen?

I am going to be 25 and I am engaged to a person only because my parents and relatives said he is a good person and good for me also. But I am not at all happy. I just said yes because of my parents and now I have lost peace. My mind is restless and I can't stop thinking about ,y future. The one who I am engaged to is a good person bt not my type. I stayed single all this time so that I could fall in love with the person who I will be married to. All these things happen with a blink of time. I just thought about my parents n situation then said ok. Day after that I got engaged. I thought I will be ok since I have done this for ,y parents but I felt like losing myself. All the things I wanted to do and my happiness was related to the person whom I will be engaged but now I can only cry on that. Still hope the engagement get call off. Now I just hate the person I am engaged to and feels sad about him also. I don't know what to do.

Today while I was praying i just thought of a crush i had on a when I was in 6th . He was a good looking and attitude boy. We studied in same class till 8th and then he changed the school. After that I never saw him. Bt i nvr stopped liking him. Till 2nd yr of college i had him in my mind. Sometimes cried thinking why he never liked me. Will he ever love me.when can I see him again. I don't remember we two talking because he is shy while talking to girls , mainly to me. At that time talking to girl means liking her and he makes fun of whoever talks to girls. We studied 3yrs together but never ever shared a word. Then how did I had a crush on this guy???...the reason is his czn. She was my bestfriend and always talked about him. Eventually I know him without sharing a word to eachother. And also that czn made fun of him by calling my name so it made him more distant from him.

So today while I was praying about,y situation I thought is there any chance I could married to that person. Just thinking of that felt a different feeling I had never felt. I was smiling thought will that happen . I thought me in red lahenga walking towards him to grab his hand at that time.....that moment made me very very happy and a grateful feeling. But whether this is possible. No it is not...if it have to happen it will be a miracle. I want to it to happen but I know it's a fantacy. I have never saw him after changing school just know his existence as am touch with the czn and he has good background which he can never be related to me. And also now I am engaged and my age is not a number. but I sincerely hope this miracle to happen and want to experience the feeling of being love and getting married to that person.

Still I am helpless... can't share this to a person as they will say I am living in a fantacy world. Who ever reads this please pray for me to get a person who I can get that feelings from.....pleaseeeeee.....just now I am questioning my existence. I am being a burden to my parents and i am not happy with the person I am engaged to.