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What to do with someone who thinks you sharing you're feelings is manipulation? That is on the brink of suicide and can't do anything because of it? For years. Who doesn't see you cleaning or cooking or actually organizing finances toward bills as a show of love or taking care of them? Someone who's love language is physical touch but doesn't want to be pursued because they're objectified at work. Who's other l language is quality time but they are so depressed that they dint want to do anything? Who says you have to figure out how to make them feel loved to actually show that you care? Who resents you for taking care of kids at home because they had to work to pay bills cuz they had better paying job? Who believes you have been using them entire life but still asked you to marry and have kids? Who says theyre about to leave and never talk to you again if you dont stuff down your issues and take care if what they need? They never felt genuine love from anyone and don't believe in counseling or therapy.
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They eventually are nice to be around for a little. Almost like another person. They don't apologize always, or they do but an excuse like not eating for days is why cuz I didn't cook or shop right. But the good person to be around still says that I gotta fix everything and they still feel all the awful ways they said. Sorry is always blanket sorry, not like "Sorry I said you are a x, you, z or sorry I broke this when I was freaking out" they slam doors but then if I get upset and do same they say I can't or they are done with me for disrespect, abuse, and quitting on us.
ReplyIf I talk to quiet while they yelling then say I do it to make them look bad so I can call them abuser when I'm being abusive. They say they won't give me money for sitter and won't watch kids while I work no more but I can't afford to make even cheapest household keep going. No credit cuz it's filled trying to make sure they have stuff they need cuz they yell if I don't buy what they need. Also say they don't yell but feels like yelling to me. No family help, everyone is broke, in nasty, little, unsafe homes. Said they will go full custody and know I can't pay for everything to keep babies stable. Make me feel bad that they life will be ruined if they have to pay child support cuz they won't afford living either. I tell them if they want go, I take care of our babies anyway needed but they say they never letting anyone take their babies.
ReplyGet a lawyer asap and I wouldn't let him know about it until you are safe to do so. This is a lot of detail that seems seriously fucked up. It definitely sounds like he's being some level of abusive, and around kids, double not good. Best thing, 99% of the time, here is prepare every way you can and get out. Again, lawyer is best first move.
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