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I just wanted to express and release this feeling, I cant tell it in just one word.
I'm 22 yrs. old, I suddenly realized that I'm on my own, I can do things on my own, but despite of doing them, it ended up like I still needed my parents support, as if they finance almost everything. I'm still studying and just 1 year left before I graduate, we were 6 siblings, 4 grads and 2 were still studying, when I heard this from my sister that she/they won't be there to finance my studies completely so I needed to look for a part time work so that I can finance myself and even buy me stuffs needed. And at that moment I felt like I woke up even I was awake and all I can do is stare blankly with nothing else to do but to complete the task on my studies in college, days passess by and I'm still haven't made my decisions to look for a job most likely because my schedules might conflicting. So instead of thinking of this things deeply and just might ended depressed for not doing anything, I'm just focusing to the studies because the university I studied is private and finances are high it might too impossible to pay tutions even in the next semester.
I'm still eager to continue finishing the course I even have bad grades and failed few times, and lately I've been thinking that its this money will be a problem.
I can look for a job its just that I needed support or someone who can guide me in order to land one and feels like money is being centered to most of things you needed. I'm searching for some part timejobs online, but I can't pursue because I'm thinking ahead of time that it doesn't fit me as a my job and I have no experience.
I just can't stop thinking of being 'ended up with nothing' person,
I have this feeling of small ounce of independence in me but mostly I'm one seeking of help, maybe I'm not fully prepared enough to face this as a challenge, which is why I needed support from my family. I just wanted to express these even I might still be thinking of it.
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With the way you are thinking you will end up without a job. You don't need anyone's help to land a job. All you have to do is apply for part time jobs and go for interviews. It isn't hard. At the interview as well as answering their questions ask questions yourself because that way you will sound as though you are very interested in the job, and you will have a better chance of getting one. I left school at the age of 15 and was going for job interviews then. So, you can do this at 22. Good luck.
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