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I am in my first year in University. My first semester finals are approaching next week and I've studied but I've so much more to get done. I think I'm pretty stressed out because my parents are expecting high grades from me because I have been not too bad in my work so far, but this time I am not sure I will live up to their expectations. My internal assessments for one unit were not as much I expected which threw me off the entire day and I could barely get work done.
I also got out of a relationship (long-distance wasn't working for us) which I am taking it quite healthy compared to my first break-up. I still think about the hurtful things that happened which gets to me a bit and I get upset thinking about how he accused me of doing things I never did, and more specifically I get hurt when I think about when he said I was a mistake.
I started having a small crush on another guy a week ago which makes me feel like I'm getting over my ex slowly. The crush of course is not interested but I don't really mind. It's much better than how I dealt with after my first relationship where I had on and off hooked ups till my second boyfriend. I still crave to get affection from my crush though (only possible in my dreams) and think about an occasional hook up (does that make me a bad person?)
I am not that unhappy, my friends are amazing but there is so much I can tell them. I don't think I would get any responses for this but I just wanted to type this and post it.
Thank you in advance if anyone replies xx
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I don't know, what I should write as a reply.
I do want to reply to your post, though. Because I just got a feeling of familiarity when I read it. I don't know why. Your way of writing about things spoke to me. And so I wanted to give a sign or something. Write and be like: " Hey, I'm here too and I heard you."
Well, so here's that.
I've been trough similar stuff, but if you think of it, a lot of people may go trough similar things.
I didn't experience the exact feeling you feel or felt, as no one can.
Everyone does experience things differently.
So I really can't offer you any advice, can I?
I also really don't like advice. It's always some kind of motivational speech like: "It will get better." or "things look worse than they are."
But really, I can't say that, because in all honesty: sometimes things are what they are and it won't just get better.
Anyways, I don't think you are a bad person for thinking about an occasional hook up with your crush.
Now i wrote a lot and got carried away and you'll probably think I'm some sort of freaky creep that hasn't got a life.
ReplyThat meant a lot to me. Thank you
Reply