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She lays next to me... as a friend. I watch her text her new lover, its beautiful how engaged they are. I miss her kisses. I wish things worked differently. But I love her so much the easiest way to stop thinking about her and crying is to be near her so i can't let them out in front of her... I know what I'm doing can't be good for my mental and emotional health. But if I stand by her forever like I promised... Maybe she'll love me. It won't be how i want, but it will be love; right?
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I'm not good enough for her.
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I've had that dream a thousand times..
5 years ago I fell in love for the first time. I fell for your blonde hair, your freckles, your blue eyes, your laugh and most of all for the way you are. I li...
I'm sorry, the love you dream of is dead.Being near her is hurting you, it will always be impossible to separate your desire for more with what you currently have.You will have to do something hard, you will have to quit being her friend. The truth is your friendship is really only an illusion anyways. You're hoping for more and she isn't going to take it there. You aren't friends. You need to find some new friends, and let yourself grieve.As you start healing you will make way for love, reciprocal love of someone who thinks you are number one in the world. A healthy love is between two people who think the other person is the gold medal. Get out of this situation so you can find that love. It won't be easy but you deserve a real love, and she deserves a real friend.Good luck my friend.
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