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How do you make others happy without hurting yourself? I wish I can do that, I used to do that......sometimes I ask myself what would have happened if I made myself happy instead? I hated everything and everyone, yet I strained myself to please them, it hurt me every time I did so. They're so difficult to please, they wanted more and more......you can't blame me for isolating myself from them. I was scared, people didn't like me for being teacher's pet, for being anxious, for being quiet, for trying to be like them, for being myself. What did they want from me? I was trying so hard, now who's different? Me? They did this to me, they hurt me, but guess what? I didn't say anything.
Back then, I was too shy, too innocent.....it doesn't matter now, does it? I've changed, why don't they like me now? Because I'm silent, because I don't care? Is it because this time I glare at them? Is this how corruption works, the insults, the laughs, the pain is what change me.
Brother, this happened because you pushed me away. Mother, this happened because you showed me please other people. Father, this happened because you pointed out my mistakes. Childhood friend, this happened because of every time you joked, I took those insults. Friend, this happened because you ignored me for no reason. Friend, this happened because you talked behind my back, calling me names. Girl, this happened because you said I was skinny to please boys. Bestfriend, this happened because you manipulated me, and talked behind my back. Ex, this happened because you almost cheated on me, I know I didn't talk much but you could have broken up first.
I am such a burden aren't I? Couldn't you guys act like me? I don't feel empathy anymore, am l broken? Is hard for you guys? To please? I used to see them laugh out of happiness. You know what I find interesting, thier surprise when I show them how I am now. How cold hearted and blunt I am, how stoic my face is, even when they're angry. All in all, they're good people. Maybe they did this so I could become strong, and maybe they were surprised at how strong I became, so strong to not care anymore.
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The world is still beautiful and people need empathy, but don't give up more of yourself then you can for others. Help people if that makes you happy and don't help if it doesn't.
ReplyIf nobody has ever said this to you, let me be the first; i appreciate you. People like you are the reason why I am the way i am today and the reason why the world sometimes feels like a better place. You put others before yourself. You prioritized others happiness before your own. You took the insults and the manipulation and you let it consume you unil one day you decided you have had enough. I understand you. Completely. You know why? Because I am the exact same way.
Friends you thought that were supposed to be there for you turned out to be just like everyone else. Family you thought had your support no matter what and wouldve always been there for you are now mere strangers. For the first time, you have finally put yourself first and nobody liked it. You want to know why? Because people are cruel and don’t have a heart of gold like you do. They took you for granted and made you feel less of a human being. They thought that you were always going to be there and never say anything and when you finally did, rhey pushed back.
Im sorry that this is our life. I am sorry that nobody appreciated you and took the time to get to know you and see what kind of person you are. i am sorry that you feel that nobody has your back but guess what? I may be a stranger but I have your back. Dont ever forget that,
Stay strong, keep your head up and don’t let anyone ever diminish your shine ❤️
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