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i've been through so much; child sexual abuse by 3 family members, manipulated; if I don't do what my parents want; like be home before 8pm not be able to go out a lot, dress how they want, b who they want etc, I have friends and a bf but even then I feel like i'm too much. My so called bf subtweeted me because she's the only friend I trust so I go to her for all my problems and she basically said she has her own shit and not a free counsellor but she wants to be here for me but its unhealthy and not nice that I only have one person to rely on. Wow I'm such a dumbass for trusting and opening up to people. I wanna isolate myself, its easier that way I feel. I don't reply on anyone, don't open up to them and my feelings don't get hurt. It's a win win.
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It sounds like she needed to set limits around her relationship with you and she did. That's a good thing. No one likes to be the dumping ground for someone else's problems and emotions.
If you feel like you're "too much", you're probably right. You need to stop depending quite so much on other people to cope with your problems and learn how to better cope with them yourself.
ReplyI know exactly what you’re going through. Don’t let the other person posting fool you into thinking you’re annoying. You’re not. You’ve been through some of the roughest stuff life can throw at you. I was raped by a friend I trusted since childhood and isolated myself for 2 years. It seemed like the only means of escape at the time, and I took comfort in the silence. That being said, it felt awkward when I finally had to actually go out into the world and interact with people to get by. It’s okay to want to keep your struggles to yourself, but don’t take it to the point where you avoid talking to people completely. Too much isolation will drag anyone down. I get that you don’t trust people. I don’t either. But too much distrust will make you unable to function. And please, do whatever you can to get help. It seems like you could use someone to talk to and vent your feelings. Since it seems your family can’t provide, try finding someone at your school who can help.
ReplyAssuming you’re in school. If you’re not, I’d suggest finding a therapist or other professional. Nothing wrong with venting to someone who’s paid to listen to you vent.
ReplyThank you, I really needed your kind and helpful words. I tried getting help at my university but I use to cancel or reschedule a lot because I could't bring myself to go and talk about my emotions so they ended up letting me go kinda because I wasted their time basically.
ReplyI know the feeling. I have a habit of lying to therapists. Not a good habit to get into. Healing isn’t a fun process, but it is a necessary one.
ReplyI think I do that because I don't wanna confront what happened to through out my life and because I'm barely comfortable talking about my emotions.
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