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So, recently ive been struggling with myself. And i dont know what i am struggling with. so basically, im kinda lost. its pretty obvious to people who talk to me on a daily basis they notice how i jut seem off. i dont know i feel like im always a bit off. and overall i am i guess. and i only notice it when i dont have any work. i mean i purposely try to keep myself busy, it used to work for me before, but nowadays its becoming really hard for me to focus even on my work. so recently , okay maybe not recently. i basically stopped being friends with someone i was very very close to. and, i basically felt replaced. and for a long time, i pretended it didnt happen, pretended that you know something is going on and they are just relying on someone else for themselves, which i was fine with. until i realised i wasnt, cause i as actively crying next to them and they didnt even notice cause they were too busy with the person i felt replaced with. by the way wasnt dating this person nor is the person who i was replaced by. and, i just, i dont know how to deal with myself, i have people i know i can talk to but two have something very important going on and the other is going through something as well and im trying to help them out. and i know all three of them would come to help me anytime i need them, but i dont wanna burden them, and i know i need to stop blaming losing my friend for things, and overall i have, cause i know it happens. and im actually fine with that, but.... i sound so juvenile. i dont even want to continue. so i guess i wont. probably better off keeping things to myself.
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