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I've been thinking about it for a while, and it seems no matter what I do I never do anything right. If someone is discouraged too much, do you think that some people would try just not doing anything at all? Not do any school work, not do any chores or anything at all besides sit on a computer and try to recover and ignore everything.
I'm going to be a super senior in high school, and I have no motivation in life. I feel empty, to be honest, I always have after a certain point. Back then I used to love school and my kindness and empathy could sometimes make up for it. When I was thirteen I was being bullied by my teacher, she even thought I was doing gross stuff when it was all a miscommunication. Everyone knew... but what they didn't know that it wasn't true.
In the mid-2000's I eventually, I lost interest in everything. My love for reading, I became too impatient and I couldn't sit still enough to read books. My love for drawing and painting, everything...
Present day, here I am depressed, high school girl. I put on makeup so I don't get bullied, I still can't stand it... and on the outside, I seem fine, I don't want to get out of bed and go to school. I don't want to do anything, especially with an incident with a boy I had about a year ago.
The story with that was, he pretended to be nice got mad with me because I didn't do the gross stuff he wanted tome to do with him, he got mad, threatened to kill himself and I was stuck with him for nearly two years. Eventually, he cheated on me with his sister (son of a Morman). I managed to put my foot down and we broke up, but what he did... I won't forgive. I intended to be clean and pure on my wedding day, now I have a piece of him swimming inside me. Collecting onto my bones swimming around behind my eyeballs, sperm is alive after all. Yes, I reported him to the police... he came in with a lawyer when he was interrogated. I will admit, I am lucky though... yet no one did anything because my case was so common and I didn't have any film or audio recording. The officer knew I was right though... and I left a nice mark on his fresh adult record. I would of rather be murdered if I had a chance.
If you skipped that section, I don't blame you I just needed to rant. He won't leave me alone though...
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What a jerk! I'm sorry that creep ever got ahold of you. I'm interested in the fact that you intended to be pure on your wedding day. Are you a Christian, or have you just thought through your life? (not intended disrespectfully)
ReplySperm survive for about 72 hours hon. They’re isn’t any part of him living inside you.
ReplyHe had no right. You are alive and strong. Don’t let this experience define you.
ReplyI agree. You're way stronger than him and you are worth so much more.
ReplyMaybe she didn't know that... there are some places that don't have sex ed classes and leave it for the students to figure it all out themselves.
ReplyMaybe she didn't know that... there are some places that don't have sex ed classes and leave it for the students to figure it all out themselves
Reply