What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
I am a 28 year old woman, and I have an addiction. This is the first time that I have been able to say that. I will say all day long that I can quit whenever I want, but can I really? Its been months of using off and on, and I know I shouldn't be doing it, but I think the problem is that I don't want to quit. I like the feeling. I have thought about quitting, but then that thought completely disappears. I am not really out of control with it, but it does make me think a little crazier than usual. But, most of my suspicions have actually been confirmed, so am I really paranoid or am I just good at figuring things out? But see, I know that I can quit if I really wanted to. See, this isn't my first addiction. The first one, I was addicted to pain pills, well, really anything that would get me high. I quit that cold turkey and still have not taken a pain pill since. And that was 9 years ago. Now I am addicted to this. And honestly, I had never imagined I would ever even try it. Someone I love battles the same addiction, they have had it a lot longer than I have but I was one of those people who thought I knew all about addiction just because I had one. But you don't actually know until you have suffered with that exact thing. I would judge this person and act differently towards them cause they would have a slip up. And I would feel horrible cause I did it subconsciously. I didn't realize I was doing it. And they would say that I was being rude or treating them differently but I didn't think I was, until one day it just kinda hit me when I had heard they slipped up again. I was pissed that they did it, and disappointed, and then I realized, I was being judgmental. And I felt so horrible. Then one day this person came to me and said they had the urge to do something and they wanted it so badly. Well, I can't control what they do, but at least they came to me. And told me about it. But as I sat there and thought about it, I had come to the decision that I wanted to try it cause I wanted to see things from their perspective. So I told them and at first they were really hesitant but realized that I was going to try it one way or another and they would rather me do it with them and not some stranger. So I did, I tried it. And oh man, the feeling. It was something I had never felt before. And I guess that was it, I was hooked. Do I regret it? No. Cause I also learned so many things and had several different experiences that I would never take back. I do wish that it wasn't such an addicting drug tho. Maybe it would be easier to quit..
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Please help me
Ok so I need somewhere to just write this out because otherwise I think I'm gonna just not be able to do anything. So this is about my food addiction. It might...
-
Addiction
I often wonder if I’m helping myself to an early death. I mean, I know I have some serious problems, but how serious are they exactly? I know I certainly donâ...
Most of the problems are solved through Self control. This word is ever alive as the human kind is. Religions have been made to teach about it, battles have been fought by the societies to win a system of Self control. You can name it of Discipline or whatever.
It is like a muscle, the more you use it "regularly" (it is important), the more it gets stronger. But you cannot make it stronger by using it all at once- you will rupture the muscle.
And so you should not try to end your addiction all at once. Be patient, things happen slowly in the real world. Start doing one new thing ( start reading a page of any book daily or polish your shoes at night daily or anything) but regularly on a day to day basis. At this point we are not concerned about your addiction at all. Enjoy doing it but only when you are doing good with your This New Thing.
Let the weeks pass, and you'll see what you want to see:-
' That what you can do, you have the equal power to undo.'
With Love!
Reply