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I have a good life, I know I do. I have a family that loves me, and we're financially stable. But no matter how I look at, I don't love them. I don't trust them, and I don't feel like my house is my home. Whenever I'm at school or I'm with my friends, I always feel at home. They're the most important people in my life, and they always have been, ever since I was young. My parents are always telling me that friends will come and go, but family will stay forever, and that I should care more about my family and not as much about my friends, but my blood family doesn't feel like my real family. I hate going home, even though I know they love me, and I have a good home life, regardless of my depression and anxiety. I love being at school because I can be with my friends. But I just don't love my family back, and I don't trust them. I've tried so many times to get myself to feel differently about them, but I just don't. I can't no matter how much I try. Does this make me selfish, or a brat, or a bad person? I'm just so confused. Any advice you have is appreciated, I just don't know if my feelings make me selfish or a bad person. (Sorry that this was so long)
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Your feelings are validated. I don't have advice for you. Sorry. I don't know how to help you. But your feelings do not make you selfish or a bad person.
Replyit's okay that you don't have advice, thank you for the comment, I really appreciate it
ReplyCould you have been adopted and not have been told?
ReplyI feel almost the same, the difference is that I do love my family. It doesn't make a bad person, we dont really need to love people because we share blood. I love my family, but I do sometimes that they dont really love me, they say they do and I can see it but my mind wont let me really really see it. We have our problems, we are not perfect but I feel like Im dying everytime Im at my house. I feel so much better at school, even though it gives me stress. I wish I was with my friends a lof of the time. I feel like I can breathe when Im out of my house.
I know Im not really heloing and Im sorry, Im really bad at talking. But I just wanted to let you know that is okay to feel thay way and there are a lot of other people who feel what you feel.
ReplyI felt the same as you before and i found out that maybe you don't share or open up about your life problems to them. just like me, i only share problems with my friends and because they're the same age as me, i feel like theyc ould relate and not judge and be open with me while they give some advice. to me, if i opened up my problems to my family, I'm scared that they would judge me or treat me differently because they would think that i have problems and keep on (pushing me?) idk but it just makes me uncomfortable. idk if this applies to you , but if so , you probably feel more comfortable with your friends than your parents which I don't think that you're a brat, coz it's quite normal.
ReplyMy dear, it's ok to feel this way. Hope you take a moment to acknowledge it. Accept it. Then see how you feel.
You are not obliged to love your family. But it's a sad thing if you don't. And you owe it to yourself & your family to find out why. Seek help from a counsellor or someone who can guide you through the process. Was it something that is missing? Something that you've been hiding from your family and even yourself that you are not aware of?
It could be something so deeply rooted within you for so long that you no longer recognise it. And you need to go dig deep within yourself to find out.
Wish you all the best with your family
ReplyYou can't be always wrong about your feelings, like, maybe they realy do something that makes you feel this way about them, yet, they are your one and only family so if you feel their love and care just try to feel the same for them even if this will takes time.
You 're not bad or selfish, and Nobody choose the way he feels.
Reply