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I want to understand me. I want to know why I'm feeling this way. At first I was skipping class because the lectures are boring. I just have trouble paying attention, but I watch the online videos, read the book, its fine. But then I missed a quiz. And a homework. And an exam. And more homework. But I think I'm fine. It was mostly accidental. I was sick the night before the exam. I had work the night of the homework.
But now I'm here. Trying to figure out WHY I'm here. Not how I got here, I know that. Not why I exist, I really don't care. But why I do this to myself. Why I can't start this homework assignment. I'm not struggling because its hard to do stuff. I'm struggling because I decided to skip class. Because I don't want to do this homework. Not because its hard, but because.. I don't know why.
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You could try meditation? It might make things a bit clearer for you. You said you were first skipping class cos you you were bored, now you're not sure...i think you need to make time for yourself to just sit with yourself and relax and think, try to find joy in the course/class you're doing. You don't sound depressed, but avoiding things is usually how my negative self talk starts, so also keep an eye on that.
Maybe you need a change of routine, a hobby maybe? Reading, running or something creative maybe?
Hope this helps.
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