My Timed Entry

When I see you smiling in that photo, it almost looks like you're smiling at me. Do you remember? Do you remember holding hands? Adventures in the night? Sharing our food? Walking to class? Or has it been so many years that time has eroded who we were into a new memory; one where we didn't care as much or feel as much. Is it easier that way? To pretend it didn't happen? I wish I could feel that way. To "move on" from something like I was getting my whole heart back to pour entirely into the next thing without any fear of pain or isolation. I don't know I could call what we had was the traditional "love", but it was more beautiful than any mountain or sunset or river. We have new lives now, one where the past doesn't exist. I want to say I'm okay with that but I don't think I am. I don't have the courage to ever reach out to you but I convince myself that when I speak to you in my mind you can hear it... Well, can you? Just tell me you can hear it. If you can hear it then I will be okay with how things turned out and living in this world without you. If you can speak back to me and tell me you sometimes think of what we had fondly, that might be enough for me. We will live out the rest of our lives in this universe apart from one another, I just want to know that in some other reality we're still together and you're looking at it too.