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Sometimes I feel like I am socially weird and don't fit in, and I notice that a lot of my conversations dwindle to nothingness in a matter of moments. Any advice on how to improve this?
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You don't need to fit in if you're born to stand out
ReplyOkay, so then how do I find how to stand out?
ReplyAlso if you do want to talk to people & be "confident & extroverted" because of the "appeal" then fake it til you make it but honestly I get why. But at the same time just why? Why do you want to be like everyone else when you can be you?
ReplySometimes I wonder if I know who I am. I want to learn more about myself and learn how to be me, but then I wonder if I'm doing it right or I'm deluding myself. It's not that I want to be extroverted tbh. I'm an introvert and accept that I don't always have to have people around. Maybe self-esteem is more of the issue.
ReplyDeep inside you do.
ReplyDeep inside that I do what?
ReplyThere are kind of two options:
1. Learn about a lot of mainstream stuff like shows, movies, music, etc and you'll have options to talk about with average people.
2. Figure out what you already know a lot about and care a lot about and find stuff like meetups for that, listen to people to find people who like the same stuff in everyday life and keep learning new stuff that you truly find interesting.
3. Consider if you really care about actually fitting in with the majority of people. There's definitely an argument for not being a social outcast with 0 friends, but just keep in mind that connecting to someone who you don't actually connect with won't do as much good as you might feel it would. Think about who you really want to know.
ReplyThanks for the advice!
ReplyWell at least it's only sometimes and not all the time.
ReplyQuestion is should I be feeling this way none of the time?
ReplyDang why is everyone getting flagged?
As for the topic. Best advice I can give is see if you like the person you're talking to, like use the questions to determine this. A lot of the times, people will try to get the person to like them which tends to make you act a certain way, nervous or otherwise.
Also is this with just normal people or strangers? Or in general
ReplyWhy fit in when you were born to stand out
ReplyA lot of people feel like this. In fact, most people do even if they don't show it. My advice for you would be to look up videos on youtube if you need tips for how to make small talk with people, and then go out and practice talking to others. It can be as simple as hi. If you persist at this over time you will notice a big change in your people skills and become excellent at communicating with others.
ReplyThanks for the advice. While I do look at places at YouTube for advice I think it's the practice part that paralyzes me lol, I'll keep that in mind!
ReplyIt's okay! I'm socially weird too. i can't talk properly with people, i get nervous. Sometimes i just stand there staring at them. I don't know what to talk about. But it's okay. Try and talk about things you are COMFORTABLE talking about, like what you like doing, what's your hobby, and if you don't feel comfortable talking about other things, change the subject or tell them directly that you don't wanna talk about it. It's okay. Just because you're socially weird doesn't mean you're a weird PERSON. you're unique. try and find someone who understands you, and is socially weird too. <3
ReplyI relate. Especially when people are expressing strong feelings, I don't know (yet) how to comfort them as best I can while being honest.
Thank you for your advice, comfort is one of the best answers! I wish you luck on your growth too! <3
ReplyYou're very welcome and thank you!!! <3 Have a great day!
ReplyAvoid the ordinary, mainstream and trying to fit in commonalities. Be unique.
Reply