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I dont even know what I'm doing anymore, I wake up everyday and I just know that no one that day is even thinking or caring if I exist and that if I didn't but it wouldn't be any different. I've ruined the majority of the small number of friendships I had through my own self interest and then I'm sitting there watching everyone out together wondering why I didn't get an invite or did they even think to invite me in the first place.
Apart from my current job which is basic labour I dont even know what I want to do in the future, everyone else is at uni and has a plan and is set to do what they want to do and all I do is work and sleep.
I dont talk to anyone as I know that they aren't really interested in what I have to say, I want to delete my social media but I dont want people to believe that I'm just doing it for attention. I want attention but I want it for the right reason I want someone to wake up and think about me or they want to talk to me. But I just sit there day after day watching other people, people I thought I was friends with arrange things without me.
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i feel the exact same thing, i wish i was somebodys someone, everyones always got this one person they can’t live without and i just wish i am that someone one day. i wanted to tell you that i know its shitty but i hope one day you find someone that can’t live without you and i wish you nothing but the best. i love you keep going
ReplyListen why don’t you try to socialize with new people? And everyone goes through this thought in their life even if they are famous or rich or have tons of friends because In the end we desire what we see and what we don’t have. But losing hope in your self would be the end of the battle fighting yourself, so try talking to your friends and if they don’t give a shit, time to change your friends!!!
ReplyI care.
ReplyI'd love to be friends with you if I knew you in real life & I was your age F big jobs & paychecks. I'd care.
Reply