I want to forget him

I have feelings for him. I care about him. I'm concerned about him. He induces my innermost deepest fears and makes it come to the surface. My anxiety increases because of the love of him. I should stop this. This is ruining me. It degrades my self-love. It makes me depressed and gives me a lot of negative energy. I'm sensitive to the way he treats me. I analyse his every move in social media. I stalk him. I listen to his favourite songs. I'm obsessed with him. I have upcoming exams which I need to focus on. But I'm mentally unstable and emotionally a mess. How can I forget you? How can I stop myself from researching about the signs of a Taurus guy when he likes you? About our compatibility? I don't want this. I always end up depressed, listening to music, procrastinate, crying on the bed or sleeping. He is so difficult to love, difficult to communicate, difficult to please and difficult to get his attention.

I am grateful that I have done some things to lower my anxiety, I disabled reading receipts in Whatsapp!!!!!! So now you don't know if I saw your status or not. Or read your message or not :). It's the same about other people too. It prevents me from overthinking and being anxious.

I hope I can focus on exams just like you want me too. I will work hard and forget you. You are no good for me. You are a heartbreaker. I am not the woman you need. It's pretty obvious. I'm just a friend to you. I will love myself and ace my exams. I will get over you and enjoy my life. I will try my be to be happy without you. Happiness is a choice and I will choose it over and over again from now one.

I hope I will get out of this mess I'm in and come back stronger and powerful.