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Hello , idk whether im doing this right or not. But somehow i just dont want to expose myself for expressing this , so i make it anonymous.
Seems these weeks, ive been fully lose confidence on anything i do. Seems like I do things wrong and nothing right. It was very devastating. It was quite overwhelming for now due this pandemic all over country, online class makes me feel over pressure, feelingg down. As i was barely able to grasp all the things but the submissions , assignments all are due in short period of time. I know i dont need to get this drama on and on but idk this somehows feel so dreading. And for now i really have lost my confidence , i dont know how to boost up my cheerful mood, that relieve excitement , the self appreciation. It likes all that things not matter despite just need to rush all over the submissions assignments. Deep in my heart, i also believe that i can faced this , and i can do this. Do give me some advice and motivation to keep this spirit up.
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Start feeling better today. I know you. I mean obviously. I'm YOU lol but I know MORE what kind of a person you are now. You're only extremely happy, caring and empathetic on the surface. Even to the core but after all that "shadow work" you and I both know that we carry a lot of pain, sadness, stress and suffering deep down in there, somewhere. All that repressed trauma that came out, all of those awful moments, as well as the continued times that people still treat you like poo poo to this day. I know now it's not easy or best for you, to carry SO much negativity deep within you which you do not reveal with others for the sake of THEIR own sanity and good health.
You really are a strong person my love. Your soul carries secrets like a motherf*cker, and you have put in more than enough work for others. You've given them all too much. Now it's time to let them be. Just let them learn on their own, okay? I know it's hard to watch them struggle at times, and to still have to see that happening right before your very eyes. But at the same time, you have vented enough, a little bit here and there, to family, to friends, to strangers, etcetera. You can relax with them and find your truly genuine happy side again babe. You did the hard work, now RELEASE it. Release the stress and tension, and now focus on what you gotta do for you. It's okay, I am allowing it. Let the heart ache ease a bit and do for YOU now baby <3 I love you so much you brave, sacrificial soul! You are so beautiful to me, even if nobody else said it or saw it in you today ^-^ now GET TO WORK! Lol it's okay to think for yourself but no OVERthinking anymore, alright? If you want to do your homework SleepyBanana, I'm serious that's okay! Lol I give you permission to do for YOU now! <3
Be grateful okay? 💚 I mean that one.
ReplyThe reason you are like this is that when you went to school you left your home in the morning, stayed away for school, and then returned in the afternoon. Now you are stuck at home all of the time doing your school work there. So because you are doing this at home all of the time you are being dragged down by it and are losing your enthusiasm for it. To boost your mood again try to change your routine.
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